After a week's break (you really can't keep writing about summer sport every day, it'll get you in the end) my readerless blog is back.
Co-incidentally (or not) it returns on the day that England begin the third test match against South Africa at Edgbaston. Trailing 1-0 in the series after a desperate defeat at Headingley, England are soon in the deep brown stuff again. Winning the toss and batting first was very much the thing to do according to all of the experts (and Nasser Hussain), so when England captain Michael Vaughan did just that I felt quite confident.
For the first 20 overs or so my confidence was well founded, with Andrew Strauss and Alistair Cook putting on a first wicket stand of 68. It was not until Strauss inexplicably trod on his stumps that England's comedy of errors began. Vaughan came and went first ball, trudging off in disbelief after being given out caught behind off Andre Nel. Snicko suggested that there had been an edge, even if it was not visible at full speed. Either way, it is another big fat duck for a player fast running out of time and excuses for his poor form. If we had another obvious candidate for the captaincy the clamour for his removal would be even stronger than it already is. If I was Michael Vaughan I wouldn't be reading the tabloids over breakfast tomorrow morning.
Following Vaughan back to the pavillion was Kevin Pietersen. The South African-born batsmen had scored just four when he missed a straight one from Jacques Kallis, and should probably have been given out lbw. Instead umpire Steve Davis decided that Pietersen had nicked the ball, which ballooned up off his pad and into the arms of Ashwell Prince. Next to go was Cook, caught at slip by Kallis off the bowling of Nel in a manner that he had been threatening all the way through his 76.
All of which led to the entrance of Paul Collingwood alongside Ian Bell. Collingwood has all the confidence of a zebra drinking in a stream full of crocodiles, and it surprised nobody when he edged Kallis to Graeme Smith having made just four. If he does no better in the second innings (should England get that far) then surely it is time for him to go back to Durham for the rest of the season. He needs a sustained period in county cricket to enable him to find his form. It is simply not going to happen in the test arena.
Bell reached a well-made 50 before he was caught behind by Mark Boucher. It was Makaya Nitini's first wicket of the match, and left England reeling on 173-6. Tim Ambrose came in to join Andrew Flintoff, and showed exactly why he is not a test match number six. After toiling to a scratchy 22 he chopped wildly on to his stumps to give Kallis his third wicket and South Africa's seventh with the score on 212. Ryan Sidebottom came and went, caught by Boucher for just 2 to become Ntini's second scalp at 215-8. James Anderson and Monty Panesar were ludicrously run out by Flintoff for 1 each off consecutive balls, leaving the Lancastrian not out on 36 but England all out for 231.
Perhaps the brightest spot of England's dismal day came when Flintoff had Smith caught at slip by Strauss for only 7 to leave the Proteas on 17-1. Twenty-one more runs were added without further damage in the remaining overs, so Neil McKenzie and night watchman Paul Harris will resume in the morning on 12 and 10 respectively and South Africa in full control on 38-1.
Wednesday 30 July 2008
Tuesday 22 July 2008
Disenfranchised
There may be two blog entries today, because I need the whole of this one to vent my splenetic juices at the Rugby Football League.
Today the game's great leader made it's long awaited announcement on the 14 teams who will comprise Super League from 2009-2011 inclusive. Surprises were not forthcoming as all 12 existing clubs earned a license or 'franchise', with the two additional places going to Celtic Crusaders of Bridgend and the Salford City Reds. All of which meant no place for Widnes Vikings, Leigh Centurions, Halifax and Featherstone Rovers, or the emerging force of Toulouse in France.
But that's not my problem. Perhaps these teams don't deserve a place at present. I don't know, I haven't seen the bids. What I do know is that if Widnes have missed out based on their recent financial difficulties (the club were placed into administration after losing last year's National League One Grand Final and thus missing out on Super League for 2008), then the Super League must hold up it's hand and accept some responsibility for their plight. After all, who was it that took the decision to unfairly throw Widnes out of the dance when Super League kicked off in 1996? The powers that wannabe decided that Paris St.Germain would be a better bet for their new venture, a decision that in terms of foresight was comparable to Alan Williams' decision to let Brian Epstein take over the management of The Beatles.
Widnes were never going to draw the same crowds once they were playing in a lower level, and although they enjoyed a brief revival under Neil Kelly some years ago, have never recovered.
What the RFL fail to realise is that this kind of fast-track expansion of rugby league is both unnecessary and unworkable. The much vaunted success of Catalans Dragons over the last three years has come on the back of their ability to sign big-name Australians and New Zealanders. Men like Stacey Jones, Casey Maguire, Clint Greenshields and Alex Chan have considerably bolstered their playing strength, and it has had little to do with home-grown talent. The French national team's recent demolition at the hands of England in Toulouse shows that their success is doing little for the international game.
So what if the vast majority of England's best rugby league sides reside in Lancashire and Yorkshire? Who cares if it is perceived as a 'northern game'? That's just paper talk. A quick look at rugby union's Premiership shows a similar southern bias. Are they falling over themselves to set up a team in Barrow or Blackpool? Super League is a thriving product in it's current form, and is so because it contains teams from areas where we know that the people will back the game by coming through the gates. Catalans Dragons are performing well on and off the field this year (thanks in no small part to the boost offered to them by overseas players), but should they begin to struggle don't be surprised if interest dwindles and attendances suffer. Similarly in Wales, the Celtic Crusaders will struggle to carry out their 'business plan' if it turns out that they can't compete with St.Helens and Leeds after all.
To try to ensure that these expansion teams are not on-field flops the RFL brazenly moves the goalposts in terms of overseas quotas and other Super League criteria. How laughable is it for clubs to earn a point on their application for having no other club within 20 miles? Are the RFL seriously suggesting that local derbies are A Bad Thing for the game? Tell that to the people of Hull, or those for whom St.Helens v Wigan or Leeds v Bradford is often the be all and end all of their season. At a certain point the decision to spread the clubs as far and as wide as the geographical boundaries of Europe allow is only going to make the game unaffordable for the very same fans who have been supporting it for generations.
Expansion of the game is not totally undesirable. It is just that it needs to happen at lower levels before you can foist it on the top flight at the expense of proper rugby league communities. If the RFL want teams in Wales, the Midlands and another in France then fine, have them start at the bottom and prove that there is a genuine appetite for the game in their communities. Widnes, Leigh, Halifax and Featherstone fans would turn out to see their team if it was playing in the Sunday pub league. The same cannot be said of these expansion outfits as yet, which is exactly why the RFL perceive that they can't afford to take that risk. They know full well that four or five years of toil in the lower leagues spent developing their own players to the standard required would kill off the interest of those in Bridgend, Toulouse, Perpignan and even London.
If all of this isn't enough to put you off the license system then consider the fact that relegation from Super League no longer exists. We are already seeing how this renders half of the season irrelevant for a number of clubs, with Castleford Tigers, Huddersfield Giants and Harlequins just about ready to pack up and go home for the year already. The same would be true of Hull but for their controversial Challenge Cup run. It's tempting to suggest a link between this and the decision not to throw the black and whites out of the cup for fielding an ineligible player, but that would be to credit the RFL with far more nous than they possess.
The awful truth is that, far from inspiring all 14 clubs to believe they have a chance to win Super League over the next three years, the new arrangement merely serves to de-motivate those at the bottom end of the table for half of their league programme. And wither now the National League? The carrot of gaining a franchise for 2009 just about maintained the interest of seven National League One clubs up to this point, but with hope gone for three years it is going to be hard for them to get excited about any league match between now and then. We're told that even those who were unsuccessful on this occasion support the new process, which seems to me rather like the proverbial turkey ballot in late December.
Today the game's great leader made it's long awaited announcement on the 14 teams who will comprise Super League from 2009-2011 inclusive. Surprises were not forthcoming as all 12 existing clubs earned a license or 'franchise', with the two additional places going to Celtic Crusaders of Bridgend and the Salford City Reds. All of which meant no place for Widnes Vikings, Leigh Centurions, Halifax and Featherstone Rovers, or the emerging force of Toulouse in France.
But that's not my problem. Perhaps these teams don't deserve a place at present. I don't know, I haven't seen the bids. What I do know is that if Widnes have missed out based on their recent financial difficulties (the club were placed into administration after losing last year's National League One Grand Final and thus missing out on Super League for 2008), then the Super League must hold up it's hand and accept some responsibility for their plight. After all, who was it that took the decision to unfairly throw Widnes out of the dance when Super League kicked off in 1996? The powers that wannabe decided that Paris St.Germain would be a better bet for their new venture, a decision that in terms of foresight was comparable to Alan Williams' decision to let Brian Epstein take over the management of The Beatles.
Widnes were never going to draw the same crowds once they were playing in a lower level, and although they enjoyed a brief revival under Neil Kelly some years ago, have never recovered.
What the RFL fail to realise is that this kind of fast-track expansion of rugby league is both unnecessary and unworkable. The much vaunted success of Catalans Dragons over the last three years has come on the back of their ability to sign big-name Australians and New Zealanders. Men like Stacey Jones, Casey Maguire, Clint Greenshields and Alex Chan have considerably bolstered their playing strength, and it has had little to do with home-grown talent. The French national team's recent demolition at the hands of England in Toulouse shows that their success is doing little for the international game.
So what if the vast majority of England's best rugby league sides reside in Lancashire and Yorkshire? Who cares if it is perceived as a 'northern game'? That's just paper talk. A quick look at rugby union's Premiership shows a similar southern bias. Are they falling over themselves to set up a team in Barrow or Blackpool? Super League is a thriving product in it's current form, and is so because it contains teams from areas where we know that the people will back the game by coming through the gates. Catalans Dragons are performing well on and off the field this year (thanks in no small part to the boost offered to them by overseas players), but should they begin to struggle don't be surprised if interest dwindles and attendances suffer. Similarly in Wales, the Celtic Crusaders will struggle to carry out their 'business plan' if it turns out that they can't compete with St.Helens and Leeds after all.
To try to ensure that these expansion teams are not on-field flops the RFL brazenly moves the goalposts in terms of overseas quotas and other Super League criteria. How laughable is it for clubs to earn a point on their application for having no other club within 20 miles? Are the RFL seriously suggesting that local derbies are A Bad Thing for the game? Tell that to the people of Hull, or those for whom St.Helens v Wigan or Leeds v Bradford is often the be all and end all of their season. At a certain point the decision to spread the clubs as far and as wide as the geographical boundaries of Europe allow is only going to make the game unaffordable for the very same fans who have been supporting it for generations.
Expansion of the game is not totally undesirable. It is just that it needs to happen at lower levels before you can foist it on the top flight at the expense of proper rugby league communities. If the RFL want teams in Wales, the Midlands and another in France then fine, have them start at the bottom and prove that there is a genuine appetite for the game in their communities. Widnes, Leigh, Halifax and Featherstone fans would turn out to see their team if it was playing in the Sunday pub league. The same cannot be said of these expansion outfits as yet, which is exactly why the RFL perceive that they can't afford to take that risk. They know full well that four or five years of toil in the lower leagues spent developing their own players to the standard required would kill off the interest of those in Bridgend, Toulouse, Perpignan and even London.
If all of this isn't enough to put you off the license system then consider the fact that relegation from Super League no longer exists. We are already seeing how this renders half of the season irrelevant for a number of clubs, with Castleford Tigers, Huddersfield Giants and Harlequins just about ready to pack up and go home for the year already. The same would be true of Hull but for their controversial Challenge Cup run. It's tempting to suggest a link between this and the decision not to throw the black and whites out of the cup for fielding an ineligible player, but that would be to credit the RFL with far more nous than they possess.
The awful truth is that, far from inspiring all 14 clubs to believe they have a chance to win Super League over the next three years, the new arrangement merely serves to de-motivate those at the bottom end of the table for half of their league programme. And wither now the National League? The carrot of gaining a franchise for 2009 just about maintained the interest of seven National League One clubs up to this point, but with hope gone for three years it is going to be hard for them to get excited about any league match between now and then. We're told that even those who were unsuccessful on this occasion support the new process, which seems to me rather like the proverbial turkey ballot in late December.
Confused England Get A Spanking
England inevitably slump to the spanking they deserve, with South Africa winning the second test by 10 wickets at Headingley.
Starting day four on 50-2, England needed another 269 runs just to force South Africa to bat for a second time. They just about achieved that courtesy of an heroic rearguard action from James Anderson and a more fluent knock from Stuart Broad, but in the end the Proteas openers were left chasing only nine to complete the victory.
Anderson began the day partnering Alistair Cook at the crease after being sent in late on day three as night watchman. The Lancashire fast-bowler took a fearful blow to the rest from Dale Steyn, and then was hit in the head by the same bowler with the very next ball. Where many would have retired hurt, Anderson soldiered on, only to be dismissed lbw by Steyn in his next over. He received a standing ovation from the Yorkshire crowd, deservedly so after such a display of guts so sadly lacking in many of his colleagues.
Next to go after Anderson was Kevin Pietersen. Perhaps overly pumped up by the treatment meted out to Anderson, Pietersen thrashed three of his first four balls to the boundary, before edging his fifth to Mark Boucher off Jacques Kallis for 13. Entertaining stuff, but pretty far from what was required with his side still over 200 runs behind at the time.
Ian Bell was caught brilliantly (and legitimately) at gully by AB De Villiers for just four, which left England's hopes resting on Tim Ambrose and Andrew Flintoff. Both hung around doggedly for a while, but came out swinging after tea to manufacture their own downfall. Ambrose was dismissed in his preferred manner, caught behind by Boucher trying to cut Steyn over the Pennines after making 36. As for Flintoff, glimpses of the old magic started to reappear before he idly slashed a wide one to Kallis off Morne Morkel for 38.
That left Broad batting with the tail, a task he took to with admirable skill. He was always going to run out of partners, first losing Monty Panesar (bowled by Steyn for 10), and then Darren Pattinson (bowled by Morkel for a surprisingly defiant 13). Yet while his 61-run last wicket partnership with Pattinson lasted, Broad produced an array of elegant strokes including 11 fours, proving that with time he could become a genuine all-rounder in the Flintoff mould.
Post-game much of the talk was of the selection of Pattinson. The press had been apoplectic, and by now even England captain Michael Vaughan was coming around to their way of thinking. The Yorkshire man called it a 'confused selection', offering a very definite hint that we may not see Pattinson in England colours again regardless of the fitness of Ryan Sidebottom for the third test starting at Edgbaston on July 30. Chris Tremlett, Simon Jones and even Stephen Harmison appear more likely picks at this stage, with the squad announcement for that game set for this Saturday (July 26).
In football, Claude Makelele ends his five-year association with Chelsea. The Frenchman returns to his homeland to join Paris St.Germain on a free transfer. Reports from Stamford Bridge are that Dutch defender Khalid Boulahrouz will also leave, with a deal apparently agreed with Stuttgart of the Bundesliga.
Somewhat lower down the pyramid, Rob Hulse hops clubs once more, joining Derby County from Sheffield United for £1.75million. Former Everton and Arsenal goalkeeper Richard Wright returns to the club where he made his name, joining Ipswich Town from West Ham United. With Robert Green currently in a contractual dispute with the Hammers it would be unsurprising to see them make a move for another keeper before the end of August.
Starting day four on 50-2, England needed another 269 runs just to force South Africa to bat for a second time. They just about achieved that courtesy of an heroic rearguard action from James Anderson and a more fluent knock from Stuart Broad, but in the end the Proteas openers were left chasing only nine to complete the victory.
Anderson began the day partnering Alistair Cook at the crease after being sent in late on day three as night watchman. The Lancashire fast-bowler took a fearful blow to the rest from Dale Steyn, and then was hit in the head by the same bowler with the very next ball. Where many would have retired hurt, Anderson soldiered on, only to be dismissed lbw by Steyn in his next over. He received a standing ovation from the Yorkshire crowd, deservedly so after such a display of guts so sadly lacking in many of his colleagues.
Next to go after Anderson was Kevin Pietersen. Perhaps overly pumped up by the treatment meted out to Anderson, Pietersen thrashed three of his first four balls to the boundary, before edging his fifth to Mark Boucher off Jacques Kallis for 13. Entertaining stuff, but pretty far from what was required with his side still over 200 runs behind at the time.
Ian Bell was caught brilliantly (and legitimately) at gully by AB De Villiers for just four, which left England's hopes resting on Tim Ambrose and Andrew Flintoff. Both hung around doggedly for a while, but came out swinging after tea to manufacture their own downfall. Ambrose was dismissed in his preferred manner, caught behind by Boucher trying to cut Steyn over the Pennines after making 36. As for Flintoff, glimpses of the old magic started to reappear before he idly slashed a wide one to Kallis off Morne Morkel for 38.
That left Broad batting with the tail, a task he took to with admirable skill. He was always going to run out of partners, first losing Monty Panesar (bowled by Steyn for 10), and then Darren Pattinson (bowled by Morkel for a surprisingly defiant 13). Yet while his 61-run last wicket partnership with Pattinson lasted, Broad produced an array of elegant strokes including 11 fours, proving that with time he could become a genuine all-rounder in the Flintoff mould.
Post-game much of the talk was of the selection of Pattinson. The press had been apoplectic, and by now even England captain Michael Vaughan was coming around to their way of thinking. The Yorkshire man called it a 'confused selection', offering a very definite hint that we may not see Pattinson in England colours again regardless of the fitness of Ryan Sidebottom for the third test starting at Edgbaston on July 30. Chris Tremlett, Simon Jones and even Stephen Harmison appear more likely picks at this stage, with the squad announcement for that game set for this Saturday (July 26).
In football, Claude Makelele ends his five-year association with Chelsea. The Frenchman returns to his homeland to join Paris St.Germain on a free transfer. Reports from Stamford Bridge are that Dutch defender Khalid Boulahrouz will also leave, with a deal apparently agreed with Stuttgart of the Bundesliga.
Somewhat lower down the pyramid, Rob Hulse hops clubs once more, joining Derby County from Sheffield United for £1.75million. Former Everton and Arsenal goalkeeper Richard Wright returns to the club where he made his name, joining Ipswich Town from West Ham United. With Robert Green currently in a contractual dispute with the Hammers it would be unsurprising to see them make a move for another keeper before the end of August.
Monday 21 July 2008
"Can We Put Ladybirds In It?"
Before the BBC hand over to their commentary team for live coverage of the final round of the Open Championship, they run a feature on last year's winner Padraig Harrington. The Irishman is seen receiving the claret jug at Carnoustie 12 months ago, and showing off his prize to his wife and young son. It is at this point that his delighted offspring enquires;
"Can we put ladybirds in it?"
Delivered in the thickest Irish accent imaginable, it was pure Father Dougall, and easily the best moment of the tournament from a good telly point of view. Later that day, Harrington expected to be asked the same or similar after winning the title for a second consecutive year. He held off the challenge of playing partner Greg Norman, and also of Ian Poulter whose 69 shot him into second place overall. Harrington's own 69 gave him a four shot victory at three over par, with Norman finally dropping to third following a seven over par round of 77. David Howell's magnificent 67 elevates him from nowhere into 12th overall, while there are surprise top ten finishes for previous round stragglers Paul Casey and Ernie Els.
Chris Wood shoots a 72 to finish sixth on 10 over par, thus earning the silver medal for the highest placed amateur.
Yet more trouble for England at Headingley, where after finally bowling out South Africa for a mammoth 522 England end the day on 50-2. The loss of Andrew Strauss for a duck and Michael Vaughan for 21 leaves England 319 runs behind the tourists with only eight second innings wickets in tact.
More rugby league, with Bradford earning a crucial two-points at home to Wakefield. The Bulls 24-10 win over John Kear's side nudges them two points clear of the Wildcats in the race for the sixth and final play-off place with just five rounds to go. Bulls scores arrive through Paul Deacon, Ben Jeffries, Terry Newton and Iestyn Harris, while Wakefield are restricted to two tries from Darren Blanch.
There's gossip in Hull, where city turncoat Paul Cooke is mysteriously left out of the Rovers side which eventually goes down 44-18 to their city rivals Hull FC. Rumour has it that Cooke, who engineered a controversial move across town a year ago, has now played his last game for the Robins following a disciplinary incident. Coach Justin Morgan would not be drawn.
Harlequins' problems are spread more evenly around the team, as they are flayed 66-12 by the Super League's basement club Castleford Tigers. Dwayne must have left some EPO behind.
"Can we put ladybirds in it?"
Delivered in the thickest Irish accent imaginable, it was pure Father Dougall, and easily the best moment of the tournament from a good telly point of view. Later that day, Harrington expected to be asked the same or similar after winning the title for a second consecutive year. He held off the challenge of playing partner Greg Norman, and also of Ian Poulter whose 69 shot him into second place overall. Harrington's own 69 gave him a four shot victory at three over par, with Norman finally dropping to third following a seven over par round of 77. David Howell's magnificent 67 elevates him from nowhere into 12th overall, while there are surprise top ten finishes for previous round stragglers Paul Casey and Ernie Els.
Chris Wood shoots a 72 to finish sixth on 10 over par, thus earning the silver medal for the highest placed amateur.
Yet more trouble for England at Headingley, where after finally bowling out South Africa for a mammoth 522 England end the day on 50-2. The loss of Andrew Strauss for a duck and Michael Vaughan for 21 leaves England 319 runs behind the tourists with only eight second innings wickets in tact.
More rugby league, with Bradford earning a crucial two-points at home to Wakefield. The Bulls 24-10 win over John Kear's side nudges them two points clear of the Wildcats in the race for the sixth and final play-off place with just five rounds to go. Bulls scores arrive through Paul Deacon, Ben Jeffries, Terry Newton and Iestyn Harris, while Wakefield are restricted to two tries from Darren Blanch.
There's gossip in Hull, where city turncoat Paul Cooke is mysteriously left out of the Rovers side which eventually goes down 44-18 to their city rivals Hull FC. Rumour has it that Cooke, who engineered a controversial move across town a year ago, has now played his last game for the Robins following a disciplinary incident. Coach Justin Morgan would not be drawn.
Harlequins' problems are spread more evenly around the team, as they are flayed 66-12 by the Super League's basement club Castleford Tigers. Dwayne must have left some EPO behind.
Shark Tale
Again it's golf taking precedence over cricket with the third day's play at the Open Championship the event of tv choice.
Greg Norman continues his good form, and will enter the final round with a two-shot lead over defending champion Padraig Harrington at four shots over par. KJ Choi slips into a tie for second with Harrington, while the biggest mover of the day is Simon Wakefield whose level par 70 takes him to within three shots of the lead. It's another day on which the windy weather keeps scoring relatively modest, with Lee Westwood among those to drop out of contention after his round of 78 takes him to 17 over par.
To Headingley and England hit trouble on the second day of the second test against South Africa. The only victim claimed by England's bowling attack is the dubiously dismissed Hashim Amla, given out lbw by Daryl Harper off the bowling of Darren Pattinson for 38 despite replays showing that the ball would have missed leg stump by the length of Kevin Pietersen's ego. By stumps the Proteas had reached 322-4, a lead of 119 with Ashwell Prince a not out centurion and AB De Villiers providing great support in an unbeaten 70.
Super League shenannigans see a victory Leeds Rhinos in Perpignan. The 37-24 success sees them level again at the top of Super League with St.Helens, while Catalans Dragons' defeat leaves them now three points adrift of last year's Grand Final protagonists. Leeds win arrives courtesy of two tries from Ryan Hall and scores for Lee Smith, Rob Burrow, Danny McGuire, Ali Lauititi and Scott Donald. The French hit back through Olivier Elima's double aswell as scores from Cyril Stacul and Sebastien Raguin.
There's victory also for Warrington over Huddersfield Giants by just a single point. Leroy Cudjoe grabs a hat-trick of tries for the Giants but he and his team conspire to let slip an 18-6 lead to lose it on Lee Briers' late drop-goal. Wire now sit fourth, three points clear of fifth placed Wigan, although they are still six behind the third placed Dragons.
Greg Norman continues his good form, and will enter the final round with a two-shot lead over defending champion Padraig Harrington at four shots over par. KJ Choi slips into a tie for second with Harrington, while the biggest mover of the day is Simon Wakefield whose level par 70 takes him to within three shots of the lead. It's another day on which the windy weather keeps scoring relatively modest, with Lee Westwood among those to drop out of contention after his round of 78 takes him to 17 over par.
To Headingley and England hit trouble on the second day of the second test against South Africa. The only victim claimed by England's bowling attack is the dubiously dismissed Hashim Amla, given out lbw by Daryl Harper off the bowling of Darren Pattinson for 38 despite replays showing that the ball would have missed leg stump by the length of Kevin Pietersen's ego. By stumps the Proteas had reached 322-4, a lead of 119 with Ashwell Prince a not out centurion and AB De Villiers providing great support in an unbeaten 70.
Super League shenannigans see a victory Leeds Rhinos in Perpignan. The 37-24 success sees them level again at the top of Super League with St.Helens, while Catalans Dragons' defeat leaves them now three points adrift of last year's Grand Final protagonists. Leeds win arrives courtesy of two tries from Ryan Hall and scores for Lee Smith, Rob Burrow, Danny McGuire, Ali Lauititi and Scott Donald. The French hit back through Olivier Elima's double aswell as scores from Cyril Stacul and Sebastien Raguin.
There's victory also for Warrington over Huddersfield Giants by just a single point. Leroy Cudjoe grabs a hat-trick of tries for the Giants but he and his team conspire to let slip an 18-6 lead to lose it on Lee Briers' late drop-goal. Wire now sit fourth, three points clear of fifth placed Wigan, although they are still six behind the third placed Dragons.
Sunday 20 July 2008
Darren Who?
I'm so engrossed in golf today that I barely see any of the first day's play in the second test match at Headingly between England and South Africa. What I can tell you is that England are bowled out for a paltry 203, Michael Vaughan contributing another fine duck and Kevin Pietersen top-scoring with 45. On his return to the line-up Andrew Flintoff adds only 17, while the ludicrously promoted Tim Ambrose makes just 12,
In response South Africa are 101-3, having lost captain Graeme Smith for 44, his opening partner Neil McKenzine for 15 and Jacques Kallis for a Vaughan-esque 4. Hashim Amla and Ashwell Prince see the Proteas through to stumps, trailing by only 102 with seven wickets in hand.
All that is overshadowed however by England's decision to hand a debut to Nottinghamshire seamer Darren Pattinson. The press scream that it makes a mockery of the England selectors' previous policy given that centrally contracted players have always enjoyed first dibs when a berth in the side becomes available. Ryan Sidebottom is unavailable through injury, but instead of returning to one of Stephen Harmison, Matthew Hoggard or Simon Jones to fill the void England instead plump for a man who has played just six first class matches for the Trent Bridge club. And guess what? He was brought up in Australia. Hmm.
Back to the golf, and it is Greg Norman making all the headlines. The Australian doesn't play too much these days, but while his overpaid rivals are toiling away in the wind and rain Norman climbs out of bed to shoot a magnficent 70 to lie just one stroke off the lead. The man in front is Korea's KJ Choi, whose 67 makes him the only man under-par for the tournament after two days. It's not the best round however, with mulleted Columbian Camilo Villegas putting in a 65 to lie third. Tom Watson, Miguel Angel Jiminez, Geoff Ogilvy, Vijay Singh and Angel Cabrera are among those who miss the cut.
Saints roll all over Wigan at the JJB Stadium despite never getting out of second gear. The Super Mighty Ones win 46-12, with Wigan fans no doubt pointing to the fifth minute dismissal of Mike McIlorum for a high tackle on Ade Gardner as mitigation for their capitulation. My heart is not bleeding for them all that much. Saints now have a two-point lead over Leeds Rhinos at the top of Super League ahead of Brian McClennan's side's visit to Perpignan tomorrow evening.
Lastly to athletics where thankfully Dwain Chambers' drug-taking exploits have failed to offer dividends. The pretend Castleford Tigers player fails to overturn his lifetime ban from the Olympics following his transgressions of 2003, and the event will be all the more successful and worthy for his absence. There was a risible article in the Times suggesting that he should be allowed to compete in exchange for his inside knowledge on the habits of drugs cheats, which is rather like turning Ian Brady loose in the hope that he might help you eradicate child murders.
In response South Africa are 101-3, having lost captain Graeme Smith for 44, his opening partner Neil McKenzine for 15 and Jacques Kallis for a Vaughan-esque 4. Hashim Amla and Ashwell Prince see the Proteas through to stumps, trailing by only 102 with seven wickets in hand.
All that is overshadowed however by England's decision to hand a debut to Nottinghamshire seamer Darren Pattinson. The press scream that it makes a mockery of the England selectors' previous policy given that centrally contracted players have always enjoyed first dibs when a berth in the side becomes available. Ryan Sidebottom is unavailable through injury, but instead of returning to one of Stephen Harmison, Matthew Hoggard or Simon Jones to fill the void England instead plump for a man who has played just six first class matches for the Trent Bridge club. And guess what? He was brought up in Australia. Hmm.
Back to the golf, and it is Greg Norman making all the headlines. The Australian doesn't play too much these days, but while his overpaid rivals are toiling away in the wind and rain Norman climbs out of bed to shoot a magnficent 70 to lie just one stroke off the lead. The man in front is Korea's KJ Choi, whose 67 makes him the only man under-par for the tournament after two days. It's not the best round however, with mulleted Columbian Camilo Villegas putting in a 65 to lie third. Tom Watson, Miguel Angel Jiminez, Geoff Ogilvy, Vijay Singh and Angel Cabrera are among those who miss the cut.
Saints roll all over Wigan at the JJB Stadium despite never getting out of second gear. The Super Mighty Ones win 46-12, with Wigan fans no doubt pointing to the fifth minute dismissal of Mike McIlorum for a high tackle on Ade Gardner as mitigation for their capitulation. My heart is not bleeding for them all that much. Saints now have a two-point lead over Leeds Rhinos at the top of Super League ahead of Brian McClennan's side's visit to Perpignan tomorrow evening.
Lastly to athletics where thankfully Dwain Chambers' drug-taking exploits have failed to offer dividends. The pretend Castleford Tigers player fails to overturn his lifetime ban from the Olympics following his transgressions of 2003, and the event will be all the more successful and worthy for his absence. There was a risible article in the Times suggesting that he should be allowed to compete in exchange for his inside knowledge on the habits of drugs cheats, which is rather like turning Ian Brady loose in the hope that he might help you eradicate child murders.
Sandy And Rich Take Their Balls Home
Golf's the game on Thursday (July 17) with what Gary Lineker kindly informs me is the 137th Open Championship teeing off at Royal Birkdale.
It's amazing what you can get into when you have little else to do. I'm not normally a golf man but it's compelling viewing. Scottish Open champion Graham McDowell's good form continues as he ends the day in a three way tie for the lead with Robert Allenby and US Open runner-up Rocco Mediate. The trio card a first round 69, but the day will probably be best remembered for the actions of Sandy Lyle and Rich Beem.
Struggling with the wet and windy conditions both took it upon themselves to walk off the course before completing their opening rounds. All of which was met with widespread condemnation, and rightly so given the offensive amounts of money earned by even the most mediocre golfers these days.
After yesterday's ludicrous league structure announcements, cricket takes another knee in the nuts when Lancashire's Pro40 match with Gloucestershire at Old Trafford is rained off. With no play to disract him, England captain Michael Vaughan chooses the moment to not only confirm that Andrew Flintoff will start the second test against South Africa at Headingly starting on Friday (July 18), but also that he will bat at number seven. That leaves Tim Ambrose to bat at number six, and raises concerns about the strength of England's batting order in general.
Why are they announcing this the day before the game anyway? To make these statements, particularly about what position Flintoff will bat, seems unnecessary and smacks of a lame attempt to worry the South Africans. Maybe they will be a little apprehensive about facing the fast-bowling of Flintoff, but I'd be surprised if they weren't whooping with delight at the prospect of Ambrose coming in at six.
The big transfer news in football is that Gilberto Silva has left Arsenal to join Panathinaikos. The Brazilian moves to Athens for £1million, having conned the Greeks into giving him a three-year contract at the age of 31. With Alex Hleb and Mathieu Flamini also gone, the pressure is surely on Arsene Wenger to add to his midfield options before the season begins. For that reason he is linked with a move for Gareth Barry, although the England man still insists that he wants to go to Liverpool to be with his mate Stevie la.
It's amazing what you can get into when you have little else to do. I'm not normally a golf man but it's compelling viewing. Scottish Open champion Graham McDowell's good form continues as he ends the day in a three way tie for the lead with Robert Allenby and US Open runner-up Rocco Mediate. The trio card a first round 69, but the day will probably be best remembered for the actions of Sandy Lyle and Rich Beem.
Struggling with the wet and windy conditions both took it upon themselves to walk off the course before completing their opening rounds. All of which was met with widespread condemnation, and rightly so given the offensive amounts of money earned by even the most mediocre golfers these days.
After yesterday's ludicrous league structure announcements, cricket takes another knee in the nuts when Lancashire's Pro40 match with Gloucestershire at Old Trafford is rained off. With no play to disract him, England captain Michael Vaughan chooses the moment to not only confirm that Andrew Flintoff will start the second test against South Africa at Headingly starting on Friday (July 18), but also that he will bat at number seven. That leaves Tim Ambrose to bat at number six, and raises concerns about the strength of England's batting order in general.
Why are they announcing this the day before the game anyway? To make these statements, particularly about what position Flintoff will bat, seems unnecessary and smacks of a lame attempt to worry the South Africans. Maybe they will be a little apprehensive about facing the fast-bowling of Flintoff, but I'd be surprised if they weren't whooping with delight at the prospect of Ambrose coming in at six.
The big transfer news in football is that Gilberto Silva has left Arsenal to join Panathinaikos. The Brazilian moves to Athens for £1million, having conned the Greeks into giving him a three-year contract at the age of 31. With Alex Hleb and Mathieu Flamini also gone, the pressure is surely on Arsene Wenger to add to his midfield options before the season begins. For that reason he is linked with a move for Gareth Barry, although the England man still insists that he wants to go to Liverpool to be with his mate Stevie la.
Thursday 17 July 2008
Plenty Twenty; Goodbye (and good riddance to) Mr Rea
Today's the day that English cricket finally loses the plot.
Under pressure from to compete with the success of the Indian Premier League (IPL) Twenty20 competition, the ECB announce hurriedly whipped-up plans for their own rival league. Apparently featuring all 18 current county sides, the new English Premier League (EPL, what imagination) will also include two overseas teams. The identity of these is yet to be determined, just one of many ludicrous flaws in the plan.
There's more. At a time when the great and good of the sport are worried about Twenty20 overkill, the ECB have decided that what we need is even more of the shortened form of the game. As such, a Twenty20 league competition will replace the Pro40 league currently played out during the second half of the season. The aim is to play matches on Friday nights, but should that happen I for one won't be watching as it clashes horribly with Super League.
Which brings me nicely on to the ramblings of Tony Rea and Mike 'Stevo' Stephenson on Boots'n'All this evening. The show was once a flagship for rugby league discussion shows but is now a badly rushed shadow of it's former self. First we get Rea proclaiming that despite a 68-12 thrashing of Castleford, St.Helens are not in the best of form and might find that easy victories in their last three games might 'soften them up' for the visit to Wigan this weekend. On the other hand, Leeds Rhinos' 46-8 victory over Huddersfield Giants suggests that they are bang in form, and woe betide anyone trying to stop them. Can anyone spot a slight inconsistency here? In addition, Rae then went on to lambast Wigan for not getting excited enough about scoring the first try in their abject 39-22 defeat at Hull KR. Rae is heading off to coach in rugby union at the end of this season, and although he does offer some good insight into the tactical nuances of the game, I for one will not miss his inimitable brand of contradictary conservatism.
And so to Stevo, who first of all annoyed half the rugby league public by proclaiming loudly that the decision to switch next year's 'Magic' weekend from Cardiff to Edinburgh is a masterstroke. Not satisfied with that, he then went on to suggest that some of the clubs currently in Super League will be worried about their status ahead of the announcement of the 14 'franchises' included in the competition for the next three seasons.
This is bunkum of the highest order. The 12 clubs currently in Super League will stay there, with two from Widnes, Salford, Leigh, Toulouse and Celtic Crusaders joining in the fun. Put your money on Widnes and Celtic Crusaders, and don't have any sleepless nights if you support Castleford, Wakefield or Hull KR who were all in jeopardy according to Stevo following a series of reports on their applications by Angela Powers.
To on-field matters and Yorkshire Cricket Club have descended into meltdown. Following their two-point deduction and subsequent elimination from the competition formally known as the Twenty20 Cup they are comprehensively beaten by Essex in their Pro40 opener. Batting first the Tykes are bowled out for just 157, a target reached by the Eagles with seven overs to spare. Essex and Kent are two of the best sides in one-day cricket this season, but due to the vagaries of the two-tier system both find themselves playing in division two of the 40-over game. Bad seasons are not permitted in one day cricket.
To football now and Alex Hleb finally leaves Arsenal for Barcelona. Joining up with former Gooner Thierry Henry, Hleb arrives at the Nou Camp for a fee of around £11.8million. Despite earning a reputation as a selling club, Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger shrugs slightly at the news and vows to compete with the top two anyway.
One in, one out at Barca as Ronaldinho looks set to join AC Milan. Manchester City's audacious £25.5million bid appears to have failed, that despite suggestions that the Brazillian could have earned twice as much with Mark Hughes' side. Thank God, I was beginning to think that money was the only thing that mattered to footballers these days. Obviously there are still limits to what these overpaid who ponies will do to their professional aspirations for the sake of a few euros more.
I know you're dying to find out, so let me tell you that Cadel Evans still leads the Tour de France by one second from Frank Schleck after Norway's Kurt-Asle Arvesen wins the 12th stage from Lannemezan to Foix. Brits David Millar and Mark Cavendish are now in 50th and 156th place respectively.
Under pressure from to compete with the success of the Indian Premier League (IPL) Twenty20 competition, the ECB announce hurriedly whipped-up plans for their own rival league. Apparently featuring all 18 current county sides, the new English Premier League (EPL, what imagination) will also include two overseas teams. The identity of these is yet to be determined, just one of many ludicrous flaws in the plan.
There's more. At a time when the great and good of the sport are worried about Twenty20 overkill, the ECB have decided that what we need is even more of the shortened form of the game. As such, a Twenty20 league competition will replace the Pro40 league currently played out during the second half of the season. The aim is to play matches on Friday nights, but should that happen I for one won't be watching as it clashes horribly with Super League.
Which brings me nicely on to the ramblings of Tony Rea and Mike 'Stevo' Stephenson on Boots'n'All this evening. The show was once a flagship for rugby league discussion shows but is now a badly rushed shadow of it's former self. First we get Rea proclaiming that despite a 68-12 thrashing of Castleford, St.Helens are not in the best of form and might find that easy victories in their last three games might 'soften them up' for the visit to Wigan this weekend. On the other hand, Leeds Rhinos' 46-8 victory over Huddersfield Giants suggests that they are bang in form, and woe betide anyone trying to stop them. Can anyone spot a slight inconsistency here? In addition, Rae then went on to lambast Wigan for not getting excited enough about scoring the first try in their abject 39-22 defeat at Hull KR. Rae is heading off to coach in rugby union at the end of this season, and although he does offer some good insight into the tactical nuances of the game, I for one will not miss his inimitable brand of contradictary conservatism.
And so to Stevo, who first of all annoyed half the rugby league public by proclaiming loudly that the decision to switch next year's 'Magic' weekend from Cardiff to Edinburgh is a masterstroke. Not satisfied with that, he then went on to suggest that some of the clubs currently in Super League will be worried about their status ahead of the announcement of the 14 'franchises' included in the competition for the next three seasons.
This is bunkum of the highest order. The 12 clubs currently in Super League will stay there, with two from Widnes, Salford, Leigh, Toulouse and Celtic Crusaders joining in the fun. Put your money on Widnes and Celtic Crusaders, and don't have any sleepless nights if you support Castleford, Wakefield or Hull KR who were all in jeopardy according to Stevo following a series of reports on their applications by Angela Powers.
To on-field matters and Yorkshire Cricket Club have descended into meltdown. Following their two-point deduction and subsequent elimination from the competition formally known as the Twenty20 Cup they are comprehensively beaten by Essex in their Pro40 opener. Batting first the Tykes are bowled out for just 157, a target reached by the Eagles with seven overs to spare. Essex and Kent are two of the best sides in one-day cricket this season, but due to the vagaries of the two-tier system both find themselves playing in division two of the 40-over game. Bad seasons are not permitted in one day cricket.
To football now and Alex Hleb finally leaves Arsenal for Barcelona. Joining up with former Gooner Thierry Henry, Hleb arrives at the Nou Camp for a fee of around £11.8million. Despite earning a reputation as a selling club, Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger shrugs slightly at the news and vows to compete with the top two anyway.
One in, one out at Barca as Ronaldinho looks set to join AC Milan. Manchester City's audacious £25.5million bid appears to have failed, that despite suggestions that the Brazillian could have earned twice as much with Mark Hughes' side. Thank God, I was beginning to think that money was the only thing that mattered to footballers these days. Obviously there are still limits to what these overpaid who ponies will do to their professional aspirations for the sake of a few euros more.
I know you're dying to find out, so let me tell you that Cadel Evans still leads the Tour de France by one second from Frank Schleck after Norway's Kurt-Asle Arvesen wins the 12th stage from Lannemezan to Foix. Brits David Millar and Mark Cavendish are now in 50th and 156th place respectively.
Tuesday 15 July 2008
Giving Up On Gareth And Dean
Today I feel like talking about Gareth Barry. I've touched on the subject before, but since he won't go away then neither will I.
It transpires that Juventus are no longer interested in signing Xabi Alonso from Liverpool. Therefore, why would Liverpool be interested in signing Barry? The price is extortionate for a player with only half Alonso's talent, and a microscopic percentage of his integrity as a man. Barry has stopped short of referring to himself as a slave, but he has long been trying to whinge his way out of Villa Park. It's all very distasteful.
So why has this become relevant today? Well, Barry is apparently set to turn up at Villa for pre-season training tomorrow. No doubt that Sky Sports Too Much Information TV will have a camera if not inside the training ground, then as close as they can get it without having their reporter arrested for stalking. If they can give even a flavour of the conversation between Barry and Villa boss Martin O'Neill it should be compulsive viewing. O'Neill should send Barry to train with the reserves and let him stay there for the remainder of his contract if his move to Liverpool eventually falls through. Someone has to take a stand against player power before clubs are left with no players, only freelancers on short-term deals.
Arsenal are thought to be interested in speaking to Barry also, so he may yet find a way out. Let's hope not.
You may not have noticed that he was actually ever competing, but news breaks today that Dean Macey is retiring from athletics. The decathlete failed to qualify for this summer's Beijing Olympic Games, blaming a groin injury for his inability to reach the qualifying standard. Macey is the current Commonwealth champion, which sounds impressive until you consider that the Commonwealth consists of the UK nations, The Virgin Islands and Canada. Fit or not, he was unlikely to win a medal in China so perhaps it is better that we suffer this disappointment now rather than on the second day of competition after a particularly awful effort in the javelin.
It wouldn't be a summer sports day without some cricket news, but I'll keep it mercifully brief. Defending champions Worcestershire are beaten by six wickets by Nottinghamshire in the opening game of the Pro40 competition at New Road. Simon Jones, who it is said is bowling somewhere close to his England form of 2005, is rested by the Royals. Enough said.
It transpires that Juventus are no longer interested in signing Xabi Alonso from Liverpool. Therefore, why would Liverpool be interested in signing Barry? The price is extortionate for a player with only half Alonso's talent, and a microscopic percentage of his integrity as a man. Barry has stopped short of referring to himself as a slave, but he has long been trying to whinge his way out of Villa Park. It's all very distasteful.
So why has this become relevant today? Well, Barry is apparently set to turn up at Villa for pre-season training tomorrow. No doubt that Sky Sports Too Much Information TV will have a camera if not inside the training ground, then as close as they can get it without having their reporter arrested for stalking. If they can give even a flavour of the conversation between Barry and Villa boss Martin O'Neill it should be compulsive viewing. O'Neill should send Barry to train with the reserves and let him stay there for the remainder of his contract if his move to Liverpool eventually falls through. Someone has to take a stand against player power before clubs are left with no players, only freelancers on short-term deals.
Arsenal are thought to be interested in speaking to Barry also, so he may yet find a way out. Let's hope not.
You may not have noticed that he was actually ever competing, but news breaks today that Dean Macey is retiring from athletics. The decathlete failed to qualify for this summer's Beijing Olympic Games, blaming a groin injury for his inability to reach the qualifying standard. Macey is the current Commonwealth champion, which sounds impressive until you consider that the Commonwealth consists of the UK nations, The Virgin Islands and Canada. Fit or not, he was unlikely to win a medal in China so perhaps it is better that we suffer this disappointment now rather than on the second day of competition after a particularly awful effort in the javelin.
It wouldn't be a summer sports day without some cricket news, but I'll keep it mercifully brief. Defending champions Worcestershire are beaten by six wickets by Nottinghamshire in the opening game of the Pro40 competition at New Road. Simon Jones, who it is said is bowling somewhere close to his England form of 2005, is rested by the Royals. Enough said.
Monday 14 July 2008
I am Geoffrey Boycott
If I watch any more cricket I am going to morph into Geoffrey Boycott.
Bravely, I summoned up the energy to have one last blast (until the Pro40 competition starts tomorrow) as England and South Africa played out the final day of the first test match at Lords. England are twice as successful as they were yesterday, but that isn't saying much since they only took one wicket on the fourth day. All of which leaves them needing another seven wickets for victory when play is finally brought to a close around 5.00. Farcically, the players had been called off for bad light ten minutes earlier, and yet recalled to the field despite there being as much chance of a positive result as there is of a sensible statement from Sepp Blatter.
When the tedium ends it is announced that Andrew Flintoff is in a 12-man squad for the second test which starts on Friday. Paul Collingwood is the logical choice to be replaced, so expect Stuart Broad to sit it out at Headingley.
Back to the subject of sensible statements, and it seems the ECB cannot find one either. Faced with the thorny issue of Yorkshire's appeal against their expulsion from the Twenty20 Cup for fielding an ineligible player, the ECB deduct the Tykes two points which effectively eliminates the Headingly club anyway. Yet those points are not awarded to Nottinghamshire, meaning that it will now be Glamorgan who face Durham in the quarter-finals. That is unless Nottinghamshire appeal, which they doubtless will. Got that? Good on you if you have because the cricketing fraternity are very confused.
A word for Sky TV who after inviting emails for a lunchtime discussion completely dodged the issue of the grotesque arrival of 'Sir' Allen Stanford and his Twenty20 cash. Does anyone else think they are keeping their nose clean on it until they have secured the television rights?
Dutifully I still have to report on the Tour de France. I know, but I wouldn't really be able to call myself a sports journalist if I didn't now would I? There's a new leader overall, as Cadel Evans takes yellow by just one second from Frank Schleck following Leonardo Piepoli's 10th stage victory today. You'll be pleased to know that tomorrow is a rest day.
Bravely, I summoned up the energy to have one last blast (until the Pro40 competition starts tomorrow) as England and South Africa played out the final day of the first test match at Lords. England are twice as successful as they were yesterday, but that isn't saying much since they only took one wicket on the fourth day. All of which leaves them needing another seven wickets for victory when play is finally brought to a close around 5.00. Farcically, the players had been called off for bad light ten minutes earlier, and yet recalled to the field despite there being as much chance of a positive result as there is of a sensible statement from Sepp Blatter.
When the tedium ends it is announced that Andrew Flintoff is in a 12-man squad for the second test which starts on Friday. Paul Collingwood is the logical choice to be replaced, so expect Stuart Broad to sit it out at Headingley.
Back to the subject of sensible statements, and it seems the ECB cannot find one either. Faced with the thorny issue of Yorkshire's appeal against their expulsion from the Twenty20 Cup for fielding an ineligible player, the ECB deduct the Tykes two points which effectively eliminates the Headingly club anyway. Yet those points are not awarded to Nottinghamshire, meaning that it will now be Glamorgan who face Durham in the quarter-finals. That is unless Nottinghamshire appeal, which they doubtless will. Got that? Good on you if you have because the cricketing fraternity are very confused.
A word for Sky TV who after inviting emails for a lunchtime discussion completely dodged the issue of the grotesque arrival of 'Sir' Allen Stanford and his Twenty20 cash. Does anyone else think they are keeping their nose clean on it until they have secured the television rights?
Dutifully I still have to report on the Tour de France. I know, but I wouldn't really be able to call myself a sports journalist if I didn't now would I? There's a new leader overall, as Cadel Evans takes yellow by just one second from Frank Schleck following Leonardo Piepoli's 10th stage victory today. You'll be pleased to know that tomorrow is a rest day.
Sunday 13 July 2008
Oh alright, cricket is boring sometimes
Even I have to admit that today's cricket is tedious.
Resuming on 13-0 and still 333 runs behind England, South Africa bore the arse off everyone with a dogged display of stupefyingly negative batting. Both Graeme Smith and Neil McKenzie make centuries as the Proteas close on 242-1. Smith is the only man out, caught by Kevin Pietersen off the bowling of James Anderson for 107.
South Africa remain 104 runs away from forcing England to bat again ahead of tomorrow's final day's play. I'll try to stay awake long enough to bring you the news. If you want, like.
Rugby league is far more interesting. Wigan continue to delight me. Following their win over Leeds last week which helped Saints reach the top of Super League, the Warriors revert to type in somehow managing to lose 39-22 at Hull KR. Former Wigan scrum half Mick Dobson scores four tries against his old side, and adds a drop goal for good measure.
Unfortunately Wigan remain in the play-off places, lying fifth with a three-point lead over sixth placed Bradford Bulls. It looks a straight fight between the Bulls and the Wakefield Trinity Wildcats for that final spot.
I didn't see any of the Tour de France today. I fell asleep watching Neil McKenzie blocking the living shit out of the clueless Ryan Sidebottom. What I do know is that it is as you where in the overall classification, with Kim Kirchen still holding a six-second lead over Cadel Evans after Riccardo Ricco wins his second stage of the tour. Britain's David Millar has a shocker and drops from seventh to 25th overall, while two-time stage winner Mark Cavendish languishes in a lowly 151st place.
Resuming on 13-0 and still 333 runs behind England, South Africa bore the arse off everyone with a dogged display of stupefyingly negative batting. Both Graeme Smith and Neil McKenzie make centuries as the Proteas close on 242-1. Smith is the only man out, caught by Kevin Pietersen off the bowling of James Anderson for 107.
South Africa remain 104 runs away from forcing England to bat again ahead of tomorrow's final day's play. I'll try to stay awake long enough to bring you the news. If you want, like.
Rugby league is far more interesting. Wigan continue to delight me. Following their win over Leeds last week which helped Saints reach the top of Super League, the Warriors revert to type in somehow managing to lose 39-22 at Hull KR. Former Wigan scrum half Mick Dobson scores four tries against his old side, and adds a drop goal for good measure.
Unfortunately Wigan remain in the play-off places, lying fifth with a three-point lead over sixth placed Bradford Bulls. It looks a straight fight between the Bulls and the Wakefield Trinity Wildcats for that final spot.
I didn't see any of the Tour de France today. I fell asleep watching Neil McKenzie blocking the living shit out of the clueless Ryan Sidebottom. What I do know is that it is as you where in the overall classification, with Kim Kirchen still holding a six-second lead over Cadel Evans after Riccardo Ricco wins his second stage of the tour. Britain's David Millar has a shocker and drops from seventh to 25th overall, while two-time stage winner Mark Cavendish languishes in a lowly 151st place.
Saturday 12 July 2008
I'm unemployed get me out of here
All I seem to do do these days is watch cricket. If it's not Twenty20 it's County Championship, one day-international or test matches. It's symptomatic of my current lack of employment, and frankly so is this blog. I seriously doubt whether I will have time to offer you the benefit of my non-wisdom on all things sporting once I'm gainfully employed again.
Anyway let's get on with it shall we? England continue to pummel the South Africans at Lords. Having been let down badly by their much vaunted pace attack, the Proteas proceed to bat like Haydock Cricket Club. They close the day following on at 13 without loss, having been bowled out for 247 in their first knock. Monty Panesar helps himself to 4 for 74, with Stuart Broad taking 2 for 88, Ryan Sidebottom 2 for 41 and James Anderson and Kevin Pietersen picking up a wicket apiece. South Africa are still 333 runs behind and relying on the English weather.
If Warrington's win over Bradford in Super League last night was low quality, get a load of Hull's scratchy success over Wakefield at Belle Vue. It's an error strewn advert for going out walking your dog, livened up briefly by Craig Hall's length of the field effort which put Hull 26-12 up with just over five minutes left. Brad Drew replies late on but Hull hold on for a 26-18 win which just about cooks Wakefield's playoff goose.
Catalans Dragons are still only a point behind St.Helens and Leeds at the top after narrowly beating Harlequins in the south of France. Leading 14-0 at half-time the home side look to have thrown it away when Quins fight back to level at 26-26. Yet the Dragons are awarded a penalty on the final hooter, and from the one play permitted following the kick for touch they score through Clint Greenshields to seal the win. Lucky, lucky bastards. Luck, luck, luck, luck, luck, luck, luck.
Cycling won't go a way, with Mark Cavendish winning his second stage in three days in the Tour de France. Cavendish is first across the line in a sprint finish, just ahead of Germany's Gerald Ciolek. Overall Kim Kirchen retains his six second lead from Cadel Evans, with Stefan Schumacher third. Britain's David Millar remains in seventh place, one minute and 14 seconds behind Kirchen.
Dwayne Chambers is a blog all on his own, but for now I'll restrict myself to telling you that he has won the right to represent Great Britain at the Beijing Olympics on the track. The cheating, lying, pretend rugby league player romped home in the British trials 100m event in Birmingham in 10 seconds flat. Now all he has to do is win his legal battle against the British Olympic Association bye-law which prevents those found guilty of doping offences from representing Great Britain at an Olympic Games.
I haven't been this keen for a legal challenge to fail since Jeffrey Archer appealed for parole.
Anyway let's get on with it shall we? England continue to pummel the South Africans at Lords. Having been let down badly by their much vaunted pace attack, the Proteas proceed to bat like Haydock Cricket Club. They close the day following on at 13 without loss, having been bowled out for 247 in their first knock. Monty Panesar helps himself to 4 for 74, with Stuart Broad taking 2 for 88, Ryan Sidebottom 2 for 41 and James Anderson and Kevin Pietersen picking up a wicket apiece. South Africa are still 333 runs behind and relying on the English weather.
If Warrington's win over Bradford in Super League last night was low quality, get a load of Hull's scratchy success over Wakefield at Belle Vue. It's an error strewn advert for going out walking your dog, livened up briefly by Craig Hall's length of the field effort which put Hull 26-12 up with just over five minutes left. Brad Drew replies late on but Hull hold on for a 26-18 win which just about cooks Wakefield's playoff goose.
Catalans Dragons are still only a point behind St.Helens and Leeds at the top after narrowly beating Harlequins in the south of France. Leading 14-0 at half-time the home side look to have thrown it away when Quins fight back to level at 26-26. Yet the Dragons are awarded a penalty on the final hooter, and from the one play permitted following the kick for touch they score through Clint Greenshields to seal the win. Lucky, lucky bastards. Luck, luck, luck, luck, luck, luck, luck.
Cycling won't go a way, with Mark Cavendish winning his second stage in three days in the Tour de France. Cavendish is first across the line in a sprint finish, just ahead of Germany's Gerald Ciolek. Overall Kim Kirchen retains his six second lead from Cadel Evans, with Stefan Schumacher third. Britain's David Millar remains in seventh place, one minute and 14 seconds behind Kirchen.
Dwayne Chambers is a blog all on his own, but for now I'll restrict myself to telling you that he has won the right to represent Great Britain at the Beijing Olympics on the track. The cheating, lying, pretend rugby league player romped home in the British trials 100m event in Birmingham in 10 seconds flat. Now all he has to do is win his legal battle against the British Olympic Association bye-law which prevents those found guilty of doping offences from representing Great Britain at an Olympic Games.
I haven't been this keen for a legal challenge to fail since Jeffrey Archer appealed for parole.
Friday 11 July 2008
There is such thing as bad publicity
Yes I know the test match is into it's second day but stuff that, rugby league takes top billing on Fridays. Ok? Good.
Saints remain top of the Super League after larruping Castleford Tigers 68-12 at something called the GPW Recruitment Stadium. Knowsley Road to you and I. I don't approve of one-sided shellackings in Super League. It makes the competition look bad, and it won't be long before some smug Australian broadcaster is denouncing our game and comparing it to a game of tag on the school field. Nevertheless Castleford deserve it.
They've gone way down in my estimation since they got involved in the whole Dwain Chambers sideshow. It's no wonder rugby league struggles to expand when it's clubs insist on dragging it's name through the brown stuff in their desperation for a little publicity. Irish writer and dramatist Brendan Behan said there was no such thing as bad publicity. He was wrong.
Meanwhile Sky Sports were busy covering Warrington's 32-28 squeak past Bradford Bulls. It was a game which featured more errors than Richard Branson's English O'Level paper, but was no less exciting for that. The highlight of Sky's coverage was surely the comical argument between Phil Clarke and former Warrington coach Paul Cullen, guesting as a summariser for the first time since leaving the Wolves. Cullen dismissed Clarke's claims that Warrington are poor defensively (they have conceded 20 or more points in something like 11 consecutive outings), arguing that their inability to keep hold of the ball in attack puts too much pressure on them in defence.
Clarke retorted by suggesting that Warrington do not do any more defending than any other side, and the two continued to raise their spat at regular intervals during the game. Stevo weighed in by shouting 'DROP GOAL' loudly, despite the fact that no attempt at a 'one-pointer' had been made or was even in anyone's mind. It was pure Partridge.
Leeds Rhinos beat Huddersfield Giants 46-8 to stay in touch with Saints, but it is the super mighty ones who still lead the way on points difference.
And so to Lords, where England batted the living shit out of South Africa for a second day running. Resuming on 309-3, England moved on to 593-8 declared before putting South Africa in to bat for a rain-curtailed session which only comprised just over three overs. Earlier, Kevin Pietersen had thrashed his way to 153 before being caught behind by Mark Boucher off the bowling of Morne Morkel, while Ian Bell prompted the declaration when he was caught and bowled by Paul Harris on 199. Seconds earlier, Sky's comedy commentator David Lloyd reminded us that no England batsmen had ever got out on 199.
Stuart Broad was also in the runs, making 76 before being clean bowled by Harris. Paul Collingwood's position in the side must be under threat after he was (wrongly) given out caught at short leg by Hashim Amla off Harris also, while Tim Ambrose's poor form continued as he was caught by Graeme Smith off Morkel for just 4.
Kim Kirchen still leads the Tour de France by six seconds from Australia's Cadel Evans, that after Spain's Luis-Leon Sanchez claims victory in a rather hilly stage seven. Another Spaniard, Manuel Beltran, shows a keen respect for the traditions of the race by testing positive for the banned blood booster EPO.
Finally, Cristiano Ronaldo causes outrage by backing the insane comments of Sepp Blatter from yesterday, and Peter Crouch finally seals an £11million switch from Liverpool to Portsmouth. Thank God.
Saints remain top of the Super League after larruping Castleford Tigers 68-12 at something called the GPW Recruitment Stadium. Knowsley Road to you and I. I don't approve of one-sided shellackings in Super League. It makes the competition look bad, and it won't be long before some smug Australian broadcaster is denouncing our game and comparing it to a game of tag on the school field. Nevertheless Castleford deserve it.
They've gone way down in my estimation since they got involved in the whole Dwain Chambers sideshow. It's no wonder rugby league struggles to expand when it's clubs insist on dragging it's name through the brown stuff in their desperation for a little publicity. Irish writer and dramatist Brendan Behan said there was no such thing as bad publicity. He was wrong.
Meanwhile Sky Sports were busy covering Warrington's 32-28 squeak past Bradford Bulls. It was a game which featured more errors than Richard Branson's English O'Level paper, but was no less exciting for that. The highlight of Sky's coverage was surely the comical argument between Phil Clarke and former Warrington coach Paul Cullen, guesting as a summariser for the first time since leaving the Wolves. Cullen dismissed Clarke's claims that Warrington are poor defensively (they have conceded 20 or more points in something like 11 consecutive outings), arguing that their inability to keep hold of the ball in attack puts too much pressure on them in defence.
Clarke retorted by suggesting that Warrington do not do any more defending than any other side, and the two continued to raise their spat at regular intervals during the game. Stevo weighed in by shouting 'DROP GOAL' loudly, despite the fact that no attempt at a 'one-pointer' had been made or was even in anyone's mind. It was pure Partridge.
Leeds Rhinos beat Huddersfield Giants 46-8 to stay in touch with Saints, but it is the super mighty ones who still lead the way on points difference.
And so to Lords, where England batted the living shit out of South Africa for a second day running. Resuming on 309-3, England moved on to 593-8 declared before putting South Africa in to bat for a rain-curtailed session which only comprised just over three overs. Earlier, Kevin Pietersen had thrashed his way to 153 before being caught behind by Mark Boucher off the bowling of Morne Morkel, while Ian Bell prompted the declaration when he was caught and bowled by Paul Harris on 199. Seconds earlier, Sky's comedy commentator David Lloyd reminded us that no England batsmen had ever got out on 199.
Stuart Broad was also in the runs, making 76 before being clean bowled by Harris. Paul Collingwood's position in the side must be under threat after he was (wrongly) given out caught at short leg by Hashim Amla off Harris also, while Tim Ambrose's poor form continued as he was caught by Graeme Smith off Morkel for just 4.
Kim Kirchen still leads the Tour de France by six seconds from Australia's Cadel Evans, that after Spain's Luis-Leon Sanchez claims victory in a rather hilly stage seven. Another Spaniard, Manuel Beltran, shows a keen respect for the traditions of the race by testing positive for the banned blood booster EPO.
Finally, Cristiano Ronaldo causes outrage by backing the insane comments of Sepp Blatter from yesterday, and Peter Crouch finally seals an £11million switch from Liverpool to Portsmouth. Thank God.
Thursday 10 July 2008
Blather Blather Blather
That bloody Sepp Blatter eh? Or Sepp Blather, as he should probably now be known.
Somehow still in charge of FIFA despite a catalogue of gaffes that would inspire Dennis Norden out of retirement (is he still alive?) the Swiss plonker surpasses himself with his views on the Cristiano Ronaldo transfer saga.
Just when you thought the whole sorry affair was beyond tedium, up steps Bladder to suggest that Manchester United's refusal to let their man leave is an act of 'modern slavery'. I don't know how Sepp was at history at school, but it is clear that he has failed to grasp the seriousness of the effects of slavery before it was abolished. There will be people listening around the world who will have ancestors who were subjected to slavery, and for those people Blatter's comments are a sickening disgrace.
Let's have it right. Cristiano Ronaldo probably clears around £500,000 per month at Old Trafford once you add on his sponsorship deals and his bonuses. That equates to around £6million per year. This may not make him the highest paid sportsman, or even the highest paid footballer in the world, but it is a far cry from long hours of heavy manual labour topped with a liberal sprinkling of whipping and other forms of abuse.
Some have suggested that Blatter may have had a linguistic problem here, and that he had not intended to use a word that is bound to provoke such emotion and revulsion. I'm not convinced, and would argue that if he does have a problem with his English he should refrain from using it in public. Better still keep his mouth shut no matter what language he might use. Even better still, just resign. After all, any political figure making the same comparison would have been chased out of Westminster faster than you can say 'Has Gordon really put up car tax again?'
Less importantly, Yorkshire have been thrown out of the Twenty20 Cup for fielding an ineligible player against Nottinghamshire in an earlier round. This scandalous decision was conjured up by some kangaroo court at Old Trafford after the Tykes Azeem Rafiq bowled two overs and did not bat against the Outlaws without going through the proper registration paperwork. It also transpires that he does not have a British passport despite captaining England at under-15 level. Compare this with Hull FC's punishement of a £100,000 fine for fielding an ineligible Great Britain international in TWO Challenge Cup games this season and you start to wonder what's going on.
The truth is that both of these punishments are probably wrong, but it seems our sporting authorities lack the common sense to find the happy medium. Yorkshire should have been asked to replay their game with Nottinghamshire, and that they have not is a sop to Durham who argued for a bye to finals day on the grounds of fixture congestion.
On the field, Kevin Pietersen smashes 104 not out on the first day of the first test match against South Africa at Lords. I'm not really a fan of the Pietersen persona, but it was amusing to see the men from his birthplace snarling at him as he passed the landmark. Ian Bell is 75 not out in an England total of 309-3. Andrew Strauss was given out lbw for 44 despite the ball pitching several miles outside his leg stump, while the other men out were Michael Vaughan (clean bowled for only 2 by Dale Steyn) and Alistair Cook (caught by AB De Villiers off Morne Morkel for 60).
David Millar drops to fifth in the overall Tour de France standings after Riccardo Ricco wins stage six. Leader Stefan Schumacher is involved in a crash not far from the finish, allowing Kim Kirchen to take the yellow jersey by six seconds from Australian Cadel Evans.
Somehow still in charge of FIFA despite a catalogue of gaffes that would inspire Dennis Norden out of retirement (is he still alive?) the Swiss plonker surpasses himself with his views on the Cristiano Ronaldo transfer saga.
Just when you thought the whole sorry affair was beyond tedium, up steps Bladder to suggest that Manchester United's refusal to let their man leave is an act of 'modern slavery'. I don't know how Sepp was at history at school, but it is clear that he has failed to grasp the seriousness of the effects of slavery before it was abolished. There will be people listening around the world who will have ancestors who were subjected to slavery, and for those people Blatter's comments are a sickening disgrace.
Let's have it right. Cristiano Ronaldo probably clears around £500,000 per month at Old Trafford once you add on his sponsorship deals and his bonuses. That equates to around £6million per year. This may not make him the highest paid sportsman, or even the highest paid footballer in the world, but it is a far cry from long hours of heavy manual labour topped with a liberal sprinkling of whipping and other forms of abuse.
Some have suggested that Blatter may have had a linguistic problem here, and that he had not intended to use a word that is bound to provoke such emotion and revulsion. I'm not convinced, and would argue that if he does have a problem with his English he should refrain from using it in public. Better still keep his mouth shut no matter what language he might use. Even better still, just resign. After all, any political figure making the same comparison would have been chased out of Westminster faster than you can say 'Has Gordon really put up car tax again?'
Less importantly, Yorkshire have been thrown out of the Twenty20 Cup for fielding an ineligible player against Nottinghamshire in an earlier round. This scandalous decision was conjured up by some kangaroo court at Old Trafford after the Tykes Azeem Rafiq bowled two overs and did not bat against the Outlaws without going through the proper registration paperwork. It also transpires that he does not have a British passport despite captaining England at under-15 level. Compare this with Hull FC's punishement of a £100,000 fine for fielding an ineligible Great Britain international in TWO Challenge Cup games this season and you start to wonder what's going on.
The truth is that both of these punishments are probably wrong, but it seems our sporting authorities lack the common sense to find the happy medium. Yorkshire should have been asked to replay their game with Nottinghamshire, and that they have not is a sop to Durham who argued for a bye to finals day on the grounds of fixture congestion.
On the field, Kevin Pietersen smashes 104 not out on the first day of the first test match against South Africa at Lords. I'm not really a fan of the Pietersen persona, but it was amusing to see the men from his birthplace snarling at him as he passed the landmark. Ian Bell is 75 not out in an England total of 309-3. Andrew Strauss was given out lbw for 44 despite the ball pitching several miles outside his leg stump, while the other men out were Michael Vaughan (clean bowled for only 2 by Dale Steyn) and Alistair Cook (caught by AB De Villiers off Morne Morkel for 60).
David Millar drops to fifth in the overall Tour de France standings after Riccardo Ricco wins stage six. Leader Stefan Schumacher is involved in a crash not far from the finish, allowing Kim Kirchen to take the yellow jersey by six seconds from Australian Cadel Evans.
Midlands Monsoon; Cavendish Claims Win
There's very little to report today. The sporting world is, as General Melchet might have said, a baron featureless desert.
The Twenty20 Cup quarter-final between Warwickshire and Kent is postponed after a minor monsoon in Birmingham, so instead I'm left with Sport Mastermind presented by Des Lynam. It's got the black chair and everything. This particular episode also has a fat, bald Welsh man who knows nothing about his chosen subject - the Welsh rugby union team. Serves him right for watching such a crap sport.
British people insist on doing well in cycling. Following on from David Millar's surge into third place in the Tour de France yesterday, today's fifth stage is won by another Brit. Mark Cavendish is first across the line after 232km from Cholet to Chateauroux. That should get him a couple of inches at the bottom of page 63 of most tabloids. Germany's Stefan Schumacher still holds a 12-second lead over Millar and Luxembourg's Kim Kirchen in the overall standings. So what?
The Twenty20 Cup quarter-final between Warwickshire and Kent is postponed after a minor monsoon in Birmingham, so instead I'm left with Sport Mastermind presented by Des Lynam. It's got the black chair and everything. This particular episode also has a fat, bald Welsh man who knows nothing about his chosen subject - the Welsh rugby union team. Serves him right for watching such a crap sport.
British people insist on doing well in cycling. Following on from David Millar's surge into third place in the Tour de France yesterday, today's fifth stage is won by another Brit. Mark Cavendish is first across the line after 232km from Cholet to Chateauroux. That should get him a couple of inches at the bottom of page 63 of most tabloids. Germany's Stefan Schumacher still holds a 12-second lead over Millar and Luxembourg's Kim Kirchen in the overall standings. So what?
Tuesday 8 July 2008
Durham Demands; Middlesex Make Finals Day; Millar Makes His Move; Scolari's Surprises
The fallout from yesterday's Twenty20 debacle continues, with Durham insisting that they should receive a bye into finals day at the Rose Bowl in Hampshire on July 26. They claim that any decision taken by the authorities will disadvantage them because of the fixture congestion created by the postponement of their quarter-final against Yorkshire.
Probably only half listening are the ECB, who announce that a meeting will be held on Thursday to decide upon a solution. Chairing that meeting will be someone called Judge Slinger. A slinger in cricket? He doesn't sound too trustworthy. Why don't they just appoint Judge Neville Nutmeg to make the call and have done with it? As luck would have it there is a Test match between England and South Africa going on this Thursday, so the fate of Durham, Yorkshire and probably Nottinghamshire and Glamorgan in this now cash-laden competition will no doubt be decided over a huge pile of cakes and maybe some champers.
The quarter-finals carry on undeterred, with Lancashire travelling to the Oval to play Middlesex due to preparations for the Test match at Lords. If Yorkshire have been letting me down recently then Lancashire want in on the action, combusting spectacularly to allow Middlesex through to finals day. Batting first, the pink-shirted Crusaders are reduced to 21-4 early on, but a knock of 103 from the wonderfully named Dawid Malan sees them through to a useful 176-7.
In reply Lancashire also lose early wickets, reduced to 14-3 before Andrew Flintoff (who had earlier taken 3 for 17 from his four overs) started to wield the wood. He reached 53 off 41 balls before larruping a rank full toss to deep square leg and effectively ending Red Rose hopes. Dominic Cork came in late and blasted a defiant six from the first ball he faced, but in the end Lancs fell well short finishing on 164-8.
No doubt about the footaball 'event' of the day. Luiz Felipe Scolari gave his first press conference as Chelsea manager this afternoon, surprising many with his command of the English language. That's not all. The former Portugal and Brazil boss also declared that Frank Lampard will stay at the club despite several tabloids already having him pitching up at Inter Milan with Jose Mourinho. Didier Drogba is apparently 200% a part of Scolari's plans, that despite the Ivorian reportedly announcing his intention to leave west London for the umpteenth time this week. Less surprisingly, Scolari confirms that John Terry will remain club captain.
Fancy some tittle tattle? Well, Andy Johnson is said to be the subject of a 'tug-of-war' between Wigan Athletic and Sunderland. Rocks and hard places spring to mind for the Everton man. Still no formal unveiling of Peter Crouch at Portsmouth, so instead attention turns back to Scolari and Chelsea who are set to offload Steve Sidwell, Carlo Cudicini, Andriy Shevchenko, Florent Malouda and Claudio Pizarro. He'll be needing Lampard and Drogba just to be able to field a team then.
Aston Villa are favourites to be duped by Sidwell, a move which will apparently pave the way for Gareth Barry's exhaustive transfer saga to end with that move to Liverpool's bench. Villa are also set to land Steve Finnan from Liverpool as part of that deal, and are also thought to be interested in Paul Robinson from Spurs. But so are Blackburn Rovers, who may lose Brad Friedel to Mark Hughes' Manchester City revolution. Villa probably won't land Rovers' David Bentley due to the £17million asking price. They could get Didier Drogba for that.
The future of Arsenal striker Emmanuel Adebayor also remains unclear. The Togo international is refusing to commit despite the Gunners' claim that they have offered to double his wages to £60,000. Sixty thousand pounds? Don't tell Ashley Cole, will you? We don't want any more accidents.
It's been a week in which the success or otherwise of British sportsmen and women has been high on the agenda. In that context it is perhaps worth mentioning David Millar, who today climbed into second place on the overall classification in the Tour de France. Millar missed out on the yellow jersey by 12 seconds after today's stage four time-trial in Cholet. The suprise owner of the famed garment is now Stefan Schumacher, who won the time trial by 18 seconds from Millar and Kim Kirchen.
Probably only half listening are the ECB, who announce that a meeting will be held on Thursday to decide upon a solution. Chairing that meeting will be someone called Judge Slinger. A slinger in cricket? He doesn't sound too trustworthy. Why don't they just appoint Judge Neville Nutmeg to make the call and have done with it? As luck would have it there is a Test match between England and South Africa going on this Thursday, so the fate of Durham, Yorkshire and probably Nottinghamshire and Glamorgan in this now cash-laden competition will no doubt be decided over a huge pile of cakes and maybe some champers.
The quarter-finals carry on undeterred, with Lancashire travelling to the Oval to play Middlesex due to preparations for the Test match at Lords. If Yorkshire have been letting me down recently then Lancashire want in on the action, combusting spectacularly to allow Middlesex through to finals day. Batting first, the pink-shirted Crusaders are reduced to 21-4 early on, but a knock of 103 from the wonderfully named Dawid Malan sees them through to a useful 176-7.
In reply Lancashire also lose early wickets, reduced to 14-3 before Andrew Flintoff (who had earlier taken 3 for 17 from his four overs) started to wield the wood. He reached 53 off 41 balls before larruping a rank full toss to deep square leg and effectively ending Red Rose hopes. Dominic Cork came in late and blasted a defiant six from the first ball he faced, but in the end Lancs fell well short finishing on 164-8.
No doubt about the footaball 'event' of the day. Luiz Felipe Scolari gave his first press conference as Chelsea manager this afternoon, surprising many with his command of the English language. That's not all. The former Portugal and Brazil boss also declared that Frank Lampard will stay at the club despite several tabloids already having him pitching up at Inter Milan with Jose Mourinho. Didier Drogba is apparently 200% a part of Scolari's plans, that despite the Ivorian reportedly announcing his intention to leave west London for the umpteenth time this week. Less surprisingly, Scolari confirms that John Terry will remain club captain.
Fancy some tittle tattle? Well, Andy Johnson is said to be the subject of a 'tug-of-war' between Wigan Athletic and Sunderland. Rocks and hard places spring to mind for the Everton man. Still no formal unveiling of Peter Crouch at Portsmouth, so instead attention turns back to Scolari and Chelsea who are set to offload Steve Sidwell, Carlo Cudicini, Andriy Shevchenko, Florent Malouda and Claudio Pizarro. He'll be needing Lampard and Drogba just to be able to field a team then.
Aston Villa are favourites to be duped by Sidwell, a move which will apparently pave the way for Gareth Barry's exhaustive transfer saga to end with that move to Liverpool's bench. Villa are also set to land Steve Finnan from Liverpool as part of that deal, and are also thought to be interested in Paul Robinson from Spurs. But so are Blackburn Rovers, who may lose Brad Friedel to Mark Hughes' Manchester City revolution. Villa probably won't land Rovers' David Bentley due to the £17million asking price. They could get Didier Drogba for that.
The future of Arsenal striker Emmanuel Adebayor also remains unclear. The Togo international is refusing to commit despite the Gunners' claim that they have offered to double his wages to £60,000. Sixty thousand pounds? Don't tell Ashley Cole, will you? We don't want any more accidents.
It's been a week in which the success or otherwise of British sportsmen and women has been high on the agenda. In that context it is perhaps worth mentioning David Millar, who today climbed into second place on the overall classification in the Tour de France. Millar missed out on the yellow jersey by 12 seconds after today's stage four time-trial in Cholet. The suprise owner of the famed garment is now Stefan Schumacher, who won the time trial by 18 seconds from Millar and Kim Kirchen.
Monday 7 July 2008
Cricket's Rickitt; Random Re-Shuffling
A couple of days ago I was musing about how let down I felt by Yorkshire County Cricket Club. Their tame exit from the Friends Provident Trophy at the hands of Essex was a disappointment to say the least. Yet today they have gone one better.
Due to play Durham in the quarter-finals of the Twenty20 Cup this evening, Yorkshire were ordered not to play by the ECB (England and Wales Cricket Board) after it emerged that they had fielded an ineligible player in an earlier round. Seventeen-year-old Asim Hafeeq was not registered to play for the Yorkshire first team against Nottinghamshire on June 27, and what's more he does not have a British passport despite captaining England at under-15 level two years ago.
While Yorkshire have to take most of the responsibility for their shoddy administration, the ECB have showed once again why it might be better to let a herd of elephants run English cricket from now on. Somebody at the ECB must have known about the problem within a day or two of the Nottinghamshire match, yet it was not until an hour before play was due to start at Durham that the players were notified of the problem. Worse than that, the fans who had travelled to Chester-Le-Street were kept waiting in the rain for a game that was never going to happen. The fans were the last to know, with the news flashing up on the big screen some 40 minutes after Sky Sports viewers were told that the match would definitely not take place.
The ECB quickly released a statement promising to discuss the matter at an urgent meeting. That coming together of not so great minds will determine whether to replay Durham v Yorkshire, or else replay Yorkshire's offending clash with Nottinghamshire from 10 days ago. Muddying the waters further are Glamorgan, who could build a case that they should be involved again since the result of the Yorkshire v Nottinghamshire match had a direct effect on their failure to make the last eight. Another possibility is that all three will lose out, and that Durham will be given a bye to finals day at the end of July. Complicated? You bet.
Saving Sky's bacon was the fact that they had scheduled two Twenty20 Cup quarter-finals for Monday night. Following the Yorkshire fiasco, Essex entertained Northamptonshire at Chelmsford. Yet even that proved to be a damp squib, as Essex's total of 192 from their 20 overs was quickly followed by a minor deluge as the team's prepared for the Northants innings. By the time the teams got back out on to the field the umpires had decided that only 18 overs would be possible, with comedy duo Duckworth and Lewis setting a revised target of 175. Sadly, the rain and the effect of the floodlights conspired to make batting conditions vastly different from those which Essex had enjoyed. And so the match was never a contest, with Northants slumping to 3-3 and then 27-5 before finally being bowled out for 115.
Let's hope for better when Lancashire visit Middlesex tomorrow. Except they don't. The match is being played at The Oval rather than Lords because of the upcoming test match at the latter between England and South Africa. Fine, just as long as everyone is eligible to play.
The rest of my sporting Monday was spent waiting for Peter Crouch to finally leave Liverpool for Portsmouth. I've offered to drive the big man down to Fratton Park myself, if only he would just go. I don't know what else I can do, short of paying the £10million transfer fee myself. As the clock ticks past midnight, the transfer still has not officially been confirmed.
Finally tonight a bit of politics. The much-maligned G14 has been replaced by something called the European Club Association. Representing English football on this dubious Jedi Council are Liverpool's doddering Chief Executive Rick Parry and Chelsea hatchet-man Peter Kenyon. And yet they have the cheek to suggest that the new group is there to look after the interests of all clubs rather than just the elite. Hmmm. First suggestions at this brilliant meeting of minds include the re-branding of the UEFA Cup, which former West German star Karl-Heinze Rummenigge claims will make the competition more profitable and more attractive. So, still driven by money then in other words?
How will this be achieved? Why, by referring to the UEFA Cup as the Europa Cup from 2009-10 onwards, of course. Why didn't you think of that? Next on the agenda; How to stop teams from outside England, Italy, Spain, France and Germany winning the bloody thing.
Due to play Durham in the quarter-finals of the Twenty20 Cup this evening, Yorkshire were ordered not to play by the ECB (England and Wales Cricket Board) after it emerged that they had fielded an ineligible player in an earlier round. Seventeen-year-old Asim Hafeeq was not registered to play for the Yorkshire first team against Nottinghamshire on June 27, and what's more he does not have a British passport despite captaining England at under-15 level two years ago.
While Yorkshire have to take most of the responsibility for their shoddy administration, the ECB have showed once again why it might be better to let a herd of elephants run English cricket from now on. Somebody at the ECB must have known about the problem within a day or two of the Nottinghamshire match, yet it was not until an hour before play was due to start at Durham that the players were notified of the problem. Worse than that, the fans who had travelled to Chester-Le-Street were kept waiting in the rain for a game that was never going to happen. The fans were the last to know, with the news flashing up on the big screen some 40 minutes after Sky Sports viewers were told that the match would definitely not take place.
The ECB quickly released a statement promising to discuss the matter at an urgent meeting. That coming together of not so great minds will determine whether to replay Durham v Yorkshire, or else replay Yorkshire's offending clash with Nottinghamshire from 10 days ago. Muddying the waters further are Glamorgan, who could build a case that they should be involved again since the result of the Yorkshire v Nottinghamshire match had a direct effect on their failure to make the last eight. Another possibility is that all three will lose out, and that Durham will be given a bye to finals day at the end of July. Complicated? You bet.
Saving Sky's bacon was the fact that they had scheduled two Twenty20 Cup quarter-finals for Monday night. Following the Yorkshire fiasco, Essex entertained Northamptonshire at Chelmsford. Yet even that proved to be a damp squib, as Essex's total of 192 from their 20 overs was quickly followed by a minor deluge as the team's prepared for the Northants innings. By the time the teams got back out on to the field the umpires had decided that only 18 overs would be possible, with comedy duo Duckworth and Lewis setting a revised target of 175. Sadly, the rain and the effect of the floodlights conspired to make batting conditions vastly different from those which Essex had enjoyed. And so the match was never a contest, with Northants slumping to 3-3 and then 27-5 before finally being bowled out for 115.
Let's hope for better when Lancashire visit Middlesex tomorrow. Except they don't. The match is being played at The Oval rather than Lords because of the upcoming test match at the latter between England and South Africa. Fine, just as long as everyone is eligible to play.
The rest of my sporting Monday was spent waiting for Peter Crouch to finally leave Liverpool for Portsmouth. I've offered to drive the big man down to Fratton Park myself, if only he would just go. I don't know what else I can do, short of paying the £10million transfer fee myself. As the clock ticks past midnight, the transfer still has not officially been confirmed.
Finally tonight a bit of politics. The much-maligned G14 has been replaced by something called the European Club Association. Representing English football on this dubious Jedi Council are Liverpool's doddering Chief Executive Rick Parry and Chelsea hatchet-man Peter Kenyon. And yet they have the cheek to suggest that the new group is there to look after the interests of all clubs rather than just the elite. Hmmm. First suggestions at this brilliant meeting of minds include the re-branding of the UEFA Cup, which former West German star Karl-Heinze Rummenigge claims will make the competition more profitable and more attractive. So, still driven by money then in other words?
How will this be achieved? Why, by referring to the UEFA Cup as the Europa Cup from 2009-10 onwards, of course. Why didn't you think of that? Next on the agenda; How to stop teams from outside England, Italy, Spain, France and Germany winning the bloody thing.
Sunday 6 July 2008
Why I Hate Roger; Rafa Reigns; Doncaster Drubbed
I've waited five years for it to happen, so forgive my smug tone. Well, that's not strictly true. I've waited five separates sets of 12 months for it to happen, but I'm going to be smug about it all the same.
Every year since his first victory in 2003 I have watched Wimbledon in the hope of seeing Roger Federer lose. Yes, yes, I know he's universally popular and I liked him at first. But I've seen the light. When he strolled into London in 2001 and shocked Pete Sampras I nodded in agreement with anyone who proclaimed his victory A Good Thing. He didn't win it that year, nor the year after, but by 2003 he had become unstoppable. Mark Phillipousis, Andy Roddick (twice) and Rafa Nadal (twice) had all been defeated by Federer in Wimbledon finals as he equalled Bjorn Borg's record of five in a row.
So what's not to like about someone so successful? Well first of all there's the coat (sickeningly upgraded to a cardigan for the 2008 tournament). What possesses someone of allegedly sound mind to strut on to centre court looking like something out of the 1920's? He claims he's respecting traditions but I'm not having it. The 20's wasn't the only era in men's tennis, nor even the most remarkable. If he really wants to respect Wimbledon's traditions why doesn't he come out with a bubble perm and a read headband? Or maybe some long strands of shaggy hair a la Borg in the late 1970's? Purely and simply, the coat and the cardigan are nothing to do with Wimbledon traditions, and everything to do with the Federer brand. You have to be observant, but if you look close you can already see the moronic Pimms drinkers in the Centre Court crowd sporting their own replicas. Sickening.
Aswell as the get-up there's the man's smug self assuredness. A little arrogance is usually fine if you can back it up (and God knows Federer can), but the Swiss is totally humourless when talking about his favourite subject. Roger. He once remarked after a winning performance 'I had to laugh at how well I played'. Another gem arrived when he mused 'my quarter-final victory over Andy Roddick proved to the world how great I was.......er could be." Never before has a man been more aware of his own greatness while still playing the game he purports to serve. Gut-wrenching.
So join me in thanking whatever almighty power is in control of our fates that Federer failed in his bid for a sixth consecutive Wimbledon crown. Borg, who jointly holds the record of five with the pug-nosed poser, must be as pleased as I am. My eternal thanks and congratulations go to Nadal, who finally managed to get over the final hump after losing in the last two finals to Federer. It was an epic match, with Nadal jumping to a two-set lead before a couple of tie-break victories hauled Federer level. The fifth set was a story within a story, with Nadal finally prevailing 9-7 before promptly climbing into the stands Pat Cash style, to celebrate with his parents, his uncle (also his coach), and some slightly bewildered looking Spanish royalty. Federer still has every chance of matching Sampras' overall tally of seven titles, but let's hope that this is the first of many for Nadal. After all, the way Andy Murray played against the Spaniard in the last eight, it could be a while before our great hope is ready to take on the big two at this level of the game.
Coming down off my cloud I regret to have to wax lyrically about the shortcomings of rugby league. By far and away the best spectator sport there is, it nevertheless finds ways to make itself look silly which other sports can only dream of. Today's offering is the Northern Rail Cup final. The Northern Rail Cup is itself a worthy competition open only to RFL clubs outside of Super League, but today suffered a near fatal blow. League One favourites Salford City Reds crushed League Two's Doncaster 60-0 in the final at Blackpool's Bloomfield Road. Coached by former Wigan and Great Britain legend Ellery Hanley, Doncaster could have done with a bit of the Black Pearl's input on the field as they were routed by Shaun McRae's side.
Doncaster did very well to reach this stage, but surely after this outcome somebody somewhere should be looking at the format to ensure that next year's final is a proper contest. A meeting of two teams from different levels of the pyramid was only ever going to end one way. In rugby league the best team always wins, such is it's physical nature. There is no rugby league equivalent of getting everyone behind the ball and hoping to nick something on the break or from a set-piece.
There's Super League action today also, with Bradford Bulls coach Steve McNamara left fuming after Huddersfield Giants snatch the points with Chris Thorman's injury time drop-goal. Their 25-24 defeat leaves McNamara blaming referee Steve Ganson for almost everything, possibly with some justification after the St.Helens whistler blew for full-time immediately after the winning goal despite having called time off just moments earlier. Not only that, but Ganson sin-binned four more players (two from each side) and put Bulls hooker and some time thug Terry Newton on report twice. It's time to do away with the on-report system. It's a major cop-out option to prevent referees from having to decide whether to issue a red card or not. Red cards invariably spoil games of rugby league because it is do difficult to play with one fewer man in your ranks. Yet why not just adopt the system used in American sports whereby the guilty player is removed from the game but can be replaced? The offending player's team would still be penalised in that they would have one less substitute to call upon during the match, but not so harshly that they would be all but out of the game from that point on.
Elsewhere Warrington caretaker coach James Lowes got in a flap about winger Kevin Penny disrespecting Wakefield Wildcats in the Wires' 60-24 demolition of John Kear's side. Penny helped himself to a hat-trick but earned few friends and a flea in his ear after skipping across the line like something from a John Cleese sketch. Penny is the fastest thing I have seen on a rugby league field since Martin Offiah, but perhaps he needs to spend more time working on his defence and his ability to defuse high bombs and less time on showboating. Lowes clearly thinks so.
Castleford should arguaby have beaten a patched up Leeds Rhinos side last week, but make up for that failure at least in part with an 18-10 triumph over free-falling Hull KR. Rovers' city neighbours Hull also lose, going down 30-18 to Catalans Dragons. The French side are now just one-point behind St.Helens and Leeds at the top of the table, which is proof if it were needed that expansion of the game will work fine so long as we continue to disregard the needs and contribution to the sport of it's more famous names.
Every year since his first victory in 2003 I have watched Wimbledon in the hope of seeing Roger Federer lose. Yes, yes, I know he's universally popular and I liked him at first. But I've seen the light. When he strolled into London in 2001 and shocked Pete Sampras I nodded in agreement with anyone who proclaimed his victory A Good Thing. He didn't win it that year, nor the year after, but by 2003 he had become unstoppable. Mark Phillipousis, Andy Roddick (twice) and Rafa Nadal (twice) had all been defeated by Federer in Wimbledon finals as he equalled Bjorn Borg's record of five in a row.
So what's not to like about someone so successful? Well first of all there's the coat (sickeningly upgraded to a cardigan for the 2008 tournament). What possesses someone of allegedly sound mind to strut on to centre court looking like something out of the 1920's? He claims he's respecting traditions but I'm not having it. The 20's wasn't the only era in men's tennis, nor even the most remarkable. If he really wants to respect Wimbledon's traditions why doesn't he come out with a bubble perm and a read headband? Or maybe some long strands of shaggy hair a la Borg in the late 1970's? Purely and simply, the coat and the cardigan are nothing to do with Wimbledon traditions, and everything to do with the Federer brand. You have to be observant, but if you look close you can already see the moronic Pimms drinkers in the Centre Court crowd sporting their own replicas. Sickening.
Aswell as the get-up there's the man's smug self assuredness. A little arrogance is usually fine if you can back it up (and God knows Federer can), but the Swiss is totally humourless when talking about his favourite subject. Roger. He once remarked after a winning performance 'I had to laugh at how well I played'. Another gem arrived when he mused 'my quarter-final victory over Andy Roddick proved to the world how great I was.......er could be." Never before has a man been more aware of his own greatness while still playing the game he purports to serve. Gut-wrenching.
So join me in thanking whatever almighty power is in control of our fates that Federer failed in his bid for a sixth consecutive Wimbledon crown. Borg, who jointly holds the record of five with the pug-nosed poser, must be as pleased as I am. My eternal thanks and congratulations go to Nadal, who finally managed to get over the final hump after losing in the last two finals to Federer. It was an epic match, with Nadal jumping to a two-set lead before a couple of tie-break victories hauled Federer level. The fifth set was a story within a story, with Nadal finally prevailing 9-7 before promptly climbing into the stands Pat Cash style, to celebrate with his parents, his uncle (also his coach), and some slightly bewildered looking Spanish royalty. Federer still has every chance of matching Sampras' overall tally of seven titles, but let's hope that this is the first of many for Nadal. After all, the way Andy Murray played against the Spaniard in the last eight, it could be a while before our great hope is ready to take on the big two at this level of the game.
Coming down off my cloud I regret to have to wax lyrically about the shortcomings of rugby league. By far and away the best spectator sport there is, it nevertheless finds ways to make itself look silly which other sports can only dream of. Today's offering is the Northern Rail Cup final. The Northern Rail Cup is itself a worthy competition open only to RFL clubs outside of Super League, but today suffered a near fatal blow. League One favourites Salford City Reds crushed League Two's Doncaster 60-0 in the final at Blackpool's Bloomfield Road. Coached by former Wigan and Great Britain legend Ellery Hanley, Doncaster could have done with a bit of the Black Pearl's input on the field as they were routed by Shaun McRae's side.
Doncaster did very well to reach this stage, but surely after this outcome somebody somewhere should be looking at the format to ensure that next year's final is a proper contest. A meeting of two teams from different levels of the pyramid was only ever going to end one way. In rugby league the best team always wins, such is it's physical nature. There is no rugby league equivalent of getting everyone behind the ball and hoping to nick something on the break or from a set-piece.
There's Super League action today also, with Bradford Bulls coach Steve McNamara left fuming after Huddersfield Giants snatch the points with Chris Thorman's injury time drop-goal. Their 25-24 defeat leaves McNamara blaming referee Steve Ganson for almost everything, possibly with some justification after the St.Helens whistler blew for full-time immediately after the winning goal despite having called time off just moments earlier. Not only that, but Ganson sin-binned four more players (two from each side) and put Bulls hooker and some time thug Terry Newton on report twice. It's time to do away with the on-report system. It's a major cop-out option to prevent referees from having to decide whether to issue a red card or not. Red cards invariably spoil games of rugby league because it is do difficult to play with one fewer man in your ranks. Yet why not just adopt the system used in American sports whereby the guilty player is removed from the game but can be replaced? The offending player's team would still be penalised in that they would have one less substitute to call upon during the match, but not so harshly that they would be all but out of the game from that point on.
Elsewhere Warrington caretaker coach James Lowes got in a flap about winger Kevin Penny disrespecting Wakefield Wildcats in the Wires' 60-24 demolition of John Kear's side. Penny helped himself to a hat-trick but earned few friends and a flea in his ear after skipping across the line like something from a John Cleese sketch. Penny is the fastest thing I have seen on a rugby league field since Martin Offiah, but perhaps he needs to spend more time working on his defence and his ability to defuse high bombs and less time on showboating. Lowes clearly thinks so.
Castleford should arguaby have beaten a patched up Leeds Rhinos side last week, but make up for that failure at least in part with an 18-10 triumph over free-falling Hull KR. Rovers' city neighbours Hull also lose, going down 30-18 to Catalans Dragons. The French side are now just one-point behind St.Helens and Leeds at the top of the table, which is proof if it were needed that expansion of the game will work fine so long as we continue to disregard the needs and contribution to the sport of it's more famous names.
Williams Wins Wimbledon; Tykes Trounced; Quins' Capital Punishment
I didn't see a single point of it but am nevertheless duty bound to report that Venus Williams claimed a fifth Wimbledon title with victory over sister Serena. All of which makes the latter sound like a nun or a grumpy hospital worker.
There had been suggestions following their semi-final victories that the result of the final would be decided at the Williams family dinner table. Venus' victory either dispels those stories altogether, or else Venus is the beneficiary of some morally dubious nepotism. Five titles compared with a megre two for Serena? She must have been a very naughty child.
Yorkshire County Cricket Club let me down again. More specifically they let my girlfriend down. She supports all things Yorkshire having been born in Sheffield, but her boys bomb spectacularly in the semi-final of the Friends Provident Trophy against Essex at Chelmsford. To the delight of the blindingly biased Nasser Hussain Essex post 301 batting first, while the Tykes can only reach 218 all out in reply. Essex move on to meet Kent in the Lords final on August 16. Mercifully, my girlfriend and I are busy at my sister's 17th wedding celebration gathering that night and would most likely have missed it in any case.
To a real team now and the Super Mighty Saints take on Harlequins at the Stoop. Or is it the Twickenham Stoop these days? Who gives a fuck eh? The sooner we get rid of the southern, union adulterers the better. Anyway, needing to win by 32 to overtake Leeds Rhinos at the top of Super League, Saints duly oblige by blasting the Quins 54-0. Leon Pryce barely breaks sweat in turning in a man of the match performance. Whisper it, but he may actually be developing into a proper stand-off half as opposed to a very big, fast, centre being shoe-horned into the position. Along with Pryce's try there were two tries for James Roby and one each for Willie Talau, Paul Clough, James Graham, Ade Gardner, Jon Wilkin, Francis Meli and Kyle Eastmond. All in all a pretty decisive display.
Tomorrow, the men's singles final at Wimbledon and more rugby league.
There had been suggestions following their semi-final victories that the result of the final would be decided at the Williams family dinner table. Venus' victory either dispels those stories altogether, or else Venus is the beneficiary of some morally dubious nepotism. Five titles compared with a megre two for Serena? She must have been a very naughty child.
Yorkshire County Cricket Club let me down again. More specifically they let my girlfriend down. She supports all things Yorkshire having been born in Sheffield, but her boys bomb spectacularly in the semi-final of the Friends Provident Trophy against Essex at Chelmsford. To the delight of the blindingly biased Nasser Hussain Essex post 301 batting first, while the Tykes can only reach 218 all out in reply. Essex move on to meet Kent in the Lords final on August 16. Mercifully, my girlfriend and I are busy at my sister's 17th wedding celebration gathering that night and would most likely have missed it in any case.
To a real team now and the Super Mighty Saints take on Harlequins at the Stoop. Or is it the Twickenham Stoop these days? Who gives a fuck eh? The sooner we get rid of the southern, union adulterers the better. Anyway, needing to win by 32 to overtake Leeds Rhinos at the top of Super League, Saints duly oblige by blasting the Quins 54-0. Leon Pryce barely breaks sweat in turning in a man of the match performance. Whisper it, but he may actually be developing into a proper stand-off half as opposed to a very big, fast, centre being shoe-horned into the position. Along with Pryce's try there were two tries for James Roby and one each for Willie Talau, Paul Clough, James Graham, Ade Gardner, Jon Wilkin, Francis Meli and Kyle Eastmond. All in all a pretty decisive display.
Tomorrow, the men's singles final at Wimbledon and more rugby league.
Saturday 5 July 2008
A Drubbing For Durham; Kewell And His Conscience; Well Done Wigan (balks slightly)
If the ladies semi-finals at Wimbledon were a non-event, then it is difficult to describe the men's last four clashes.
Rafa and Roger will meet in the final for the third year running after victories over Rainer Schuettler and Marat Safin respectively. Neither broke sweat, so neither are worthy of another word of this blog.
Instead let's talk about cricket. Kent marched into the final of the Friends Provident Trophy with an 83-run victory over Durham at Chester-Le-Street. Bryan Robson was born in Chester-Le-Street. In fact, it is quite a hot-bed for the over-rated, housing at it does Stephen Harmison, Liam Plunkett and Paul Collingwood. All of the aforementioned are belted around the ground at will by Robert Key and company, while Bryan Robson was so out of his depth that he failed to even show up.
Anyway, what I really want to talk about today is Harry Kewell. The Aussie treatment room regular is apparently joining Galatasaray. Nothing out of the ordinary so far. After all, he was released by Liverpool after reportedly turning down a new deal, right? Well yes, but cast your mind back to 2000 when Leeds United travelled to Istanbul to play Galatasaray in a UEFA Cup tie. Kewell was in that Leeds side, and will remember all too well that two Leeds United fans were stabbed to death in the Turkish capital. Yet he still sees fit to wear the colours of Galatasaray, much to the disgust of the text happy, Talksport-listening Leeds public.
Has Harry forgotten all about the two Leeds fans who lost their lives that day? Or is he just that insensitive? Or is he just that desperate to find a new club? Let's face it, his stock has lowered considerably during five miserable years at Anfield. As controversial as it may be (particularly to Talksport's very own pretend shock-jock Mike Parry who called it 'reprehensible'), the offer from a large European club with such a massive fan base is obviously going to be attractive to a man who might otherwise have found his career in limbo.
Nobody from Kewell's camp has yet commented on the move with regards to it's effect on the Leeds community. When they do expect them to cite moves from Liverpool to Juventus by Ian Rush, Momo Sissoko and very probably Xabi Alonso in their defence. The Reds have had a rocky relationship with the Turin giants to say the least since Heysel, yet nobody raises an eyebrow when players are transferred between the two. We're forever told that football is now a business, and it looks like Kewell's move east is just another example of the how the wheel turns in the sport these days.
A final, incredibly reluctant congratulations to Wigan. The cherry and shite edge out Leeds Rhinos 23-22 at the Jamie Jones Buchanan stadium in what Sky's Eddie and Stevo called the best 80 minutes of the season. Ignoring the hyperbole it was a great match, with Wigan holding off a late Leeds rally to snatch the points. The result means that a win for Saints at Harlequins on Saturday will take Daniel Anderson's side back to the top of the Super League table having trailed by six points only three weeks ago. So, for the first and hopefully last time ever, thanks for that Wigan.
I need a lie down.
Rafa and Roger will meet in the final for the third year running after victories over Rainer Schuettler and Marat Safin respectively. Neither broke sweat, so neither are worthy of another word of this blog.
Instead let's talk about cricket. Kent marched into the final of the Friends Provident Trophy with an 83-run victory over Durham at Chester-Le-Street. Bryan Robson was born in Chester-Le-Street. In fact, it is quite a hot-bed for the over-rated, housing at it does Stephen Harmison, Liam Plunkett and Paul Collingwood. All of the aforementioned are belted around the ground at will by Robert Key and company, while Bryan Robson was so out of his depth that he failed to even show up.
Anyway, what I really want to talk about today is Harry Kewell. The Aussie treatment room regular is apparently joining Galatasaray. Nothing out of the ordinary so far. After all, he was released by Liverpool after reportedly turning down a new deal, right? Well yes, but cast your mind back to 2000 when Leeds United travelled to Istanbul to play Galatasaray in a UEFA Cup tie. Kewell was in that Leeds side, and will remember all too well that two Leeds United fans were stabbed to death in the Turkish capital. Yet he still sees fit to wear the colours of Galatasaray, much to the disgust of the text happy, Talksport-listening Leeds public.
Has Harry forgotten all about the two Leeds fans who lost their lives that day? Or is he just that insensitive? Or is he just that desperate to find a new club? Let's face it, his stock has lowered considerably during five miserable years at Anfield. As controversial as it may be (particularly to Talksport's very own pretend shock-jock Mike Parry who called it 'reprehensible'), the offer from a large European club with such a massive fan base is obviously going to be attractive to a man who might otherwise have found his career in limbo.
Nobody from Kewell's camp has yet commented on the move with regards to it's effect on the Leeds community. When they do expect them to cite moves from Liverpool to Juventus by Ian Rush, Momo Sissoko and very probably Xabi Alonso in their defence. The Reds have had a rocky relationship with the Turin giants to say the least since Heysel, yet nobody raises an eyebrow when players are transferred between the two. We're forever told that football is now a business, and it looks like Kewell's move east is just another example of the how the wheel turns in the sport these days.
A final, incredibly reluctant congratulations to Wigan. The cherry and shite edge out Leeds Rhinos 23-22 at the Jamie Jones Buchanan stadium in what Sky's Eddie and Stevo called the best 80 minutes of the season. Ignoring the hyperbole it was a great match, with Wigan holding off a late Leeds rally to snatch the points. The result means that a win for Saints at Harlequins on Saturday will take Daniel Anderson's side back to the top of the Super League table having trailed by six points only three weeks ago. So, for the first and hopefully last time ever, thanks for that Wigan.
I need a lie down.
Thursday 3 July 2008
The ICC Guide To Avoiding Disappointment; Williams Family Business; Cristiano Crocked
Today I bring good news for all sports fans who have ever experienced disappointment. And let's face it, that's all of us, right?
Whether you support Manchester United or Macclesfield Town, St.Helens or London Skolars, Lancashire or Glamorgan there is a way out of your despair. Fed up of reminiscing with your mates about how you were robbed at Wembley/Old Trafford/Lords all those years ago? Well, why not just change the result?
That's the brilliant plan devised by the International Cricket Council (ICC) today, who change the result of a test match played between England and Pakistan almost two years ago. The match was originally awarded to England (and Lord knows they need all the victories that come their way, however they come) after Pakistan failed to take the field following allegations of ball-tampering. It was a to-do which led to the exile of umpire Daryl Hair (who interestingly has no hair, think Frank Beard from ZZ Top), and which called into question the integrity of Pakistan cricket and in particular the captain at that time, Inzamam Ul-Haq.
No matter, as today the ICC decreed that the match should be called a draw. All of which creates a dangerous precedent. Three-nil down at half-time to AC Milan? Fourteen points adrift of the Bradford Bulls at Wembley? Facing the humiliation of an innings defeat by Australia at Headingley? No need to bother with miraculous comebacks, just stay in the dressing room for a while. It may take two years, but eventually the spanking you are currently taking will be transformed into a face-saving draw. What could be more simple. You might even get the chance to play extra-time. Or shall we just go straight to penalties like the Italians would like to have done in their Euro 2008 quarter-final with Spain? Much good it did them.
Staying with cricket the England squads for the first test against South Africa next week and the ICC trophy were named this afternoon. Freddie failed to make the grade as England named an unchanged test squad, while 30 names are under consideration for the ICC trophy. They include Simon Jones who despite being Welsh, was one of England's better performers in the 2005 Ashes series. Living on past glories? England? Preposterous. To be fair, Jones has been ripping through division two sides in the County Championship recently, but that's a far cry from saving England's absymal one day team.
Elsewhere the Williams sisters qualified for the ladies singles final at Wimbledon this afternoon. Ignoring the drudgery of their one-sided victories, let's jump straight to the press conference. Elena Dementieva had been asked by one sensitive scribe how she felt an all-Williams final might turn out, to which she replied that it would be a 'family decision'. One gallant female journalist attempted to defend the Russian by citing the language barrier as mitigation, but a male counterpart preferred to assume that the term 'family decision' was more Don Corleone than Don't understand. Suitably affronted, Venus responded to all of this by branding all parties 'disrespectful' and refused to be drawn any further. It was one of the highlights of Wimbledon so far, which isn't saying all that much given that the previous best was Andy Murray's growling and posturing during his comeback win over Richard Gasquet.
Today's tedious Cristiano Ronaldo story concerns the greedy dribbler's fitness. Or lack thereof. Having plucked up the courage to visit Manchester United's medical staff the Portuguese found out that he needs ankle surgery fairly sharpish. So the question might not be who will he be playing for next season, but when will he be playing next season? Looks like Russian star Andrei Arshavin will join countryman Roman Abramovich at Chelsea, even though Arsenal have expressed an interest. More laughably, one newspaper which will remain clueless suggested that Phil Scolari has demanded that the club sell Didier Drogba to make way for Samuel Eto'o. Tsk, he'll be asking them to keep the ball on the floor next.
Tomorrow, mens semi-final day at Wimbledon, Friends Provident Trophy semi-finals and the filthy, hated, cherry and white shite against Leeds Rhinos in Super League. Now that is writing to persuade if ever you saw it.
Stephen Orford
3 July 2008
Whether you support Manchester United or Macclesfield Town, St.Helens or London Skolars, Lancashire or Glamorgan there is a way out of your despair. Fed up of reminiscing with your mates about how you were robbed at Wembley/Old Trafford/Lords all those years ago? Well, why not just change the result?
That's the brilliant plan devised by the International Cricket Council (ICC) today, who change the result of a test match played between England and Pakistan almost two years ago. The match was originally awarded to England (and Lord knows they need all the victories that come their way, however they come) after Pakistan failed to take the field following allegations of ball-tampering. It was a to-do which led to the exile of umpire Daryl Hair (who interestingly has no hair, think Frank Beard from ZZ Top), and which called into question the integrity of Pakistan cricket and in particular the captain at that time, Inzamam Ul-Haq.
No matter, as today the ICC decreed that the match should be called a draw. All of which creates a dangerous precedent. Three-nil down at half-time to AC Milan? Fourteen points adrift of the Bradford Bulls at Wembley? Facing the humiliation of an innings defeat by Australia at Headingley? No need to bother with miraculous comebacks, just stay in the dressing room for a while. It may take two years, but eventually the spanking you are currently taking will be transformed into a face-saving draw. What could be more simple. You might even get the chance to play extra-time. Or shall we just go straight to penalties like the Italians would like to have done in their Euro 2008 quarter-final with Spain? Much good it did them.
Staying with cricket the England squads for the first test against South Africa next week and the ICC trophy were named this afternoon. Freddie failed to make the grade as England named an unchanged test squad, while 30 names are under consideration for the ICC trophy. They include Simon Jones who despite being Welsh, was one of England's better performers in the 2005 Ashes series. Living on past glories? England? Preposterous. To be fair, Jones has been ripping through division two sides in the County Championship recently, but that's a far cry from saving England's absymal one day team.
Elsewhere the Williams sisters qualified for the ladies singles final at Wimbledon this afternoon. Ignoring the drudgery of their one-sided victories, let's jump straight to the press conference. Elena Dementieva had been asked by one sensitive scribe how she felt an all-Williams final might turn out, to which she replied that it would be a 'family decision'. One gallant female journalist attempted to defend the Russian by citing the language barrier as mitigation, but a male counterpart preferred to assume that the term 'family decision' was more Don Corleone than Don't understand. Suitably affronted, Venus responded to all of this by branding all parties 'disrespectful' and refused to be drawn any further. It was one of the highlights of Wimbledon so far, which isn't saying all that much given that the previous best was Andy Murray's growling and posturing during his comeback win over Richard Gasquet.
Today's tedious Cristiano Ronaldo story concerns the greedy dribbler's fitness. Or lack thereof. Having plucked up the courage to visit Manchester United's medical staff the Portuguese found out that he needs ankle surgery fairly sharpish. So the question might not be who will he be playing for next season, but when will he be playing next season? Looks like Russian star Andrei Arshavin will join countryman Roman Abramovich at Chelsea, even though Arsenal have expressed an interest. More laughably, one newspaper which will remain clueless suggested that Phil Scolari has demanded that the club sell Didier Drogba to make way for Samuel Eto'o. Tsk, he'll be asking them to keep the ball on the floor next.
Tomorrow, mens semi-final day at Wimbledon, Friends Provident Trophy semi-finals and the filthy, hated, cherry and white shite against Leeds Rhinos in Super League. Now that is writing to persuade if ever you saw it.
Stephen Orford
3 July 2008
Further Freddie Frolics; Turd Party Ownership; Bad Barry The Villain
No sooner has he got all of Britain into a lather at the prospect of a Grand Slam victory, than Andrew Murray has put us all back into our misery. The grumpy Scot was thrashed in straight sets by Rafa Nadal and scarcely looked like winning a point in most games, let alone make a significant impact on the match. To be fair Nadal looked fairly unplayable. Even that arrogant schyster Federer will have his hands full against the Spaniard on this evidence. Vamos Rafa. Or something. Elsewhere Federer walloped Mario Ancic (maybe now we can all stop talking about the fact that Ancic was the last man to beat the Swiss on grass), while Marat Safin huffed and puffed his way to victory over Feliciano Lopez. The remaining match between Arnaud Clement and Rainer Schuettler was level at one set apiece when the southern softies decided it was too dark to play any more. Ever heard of floodlights? Even cricket grounds have them now. Get with it you pompous prats.
This blog has spent much of its time (did you see how I discharged my responsibilities there?) having a pop at Andrew Flintoff. Well today the big daft lad with the mega-thick medical records went out and shoved my words down my throat.
The final day of Sussex v Lancashire at Hove looked like being a rain-ruined affair, but when the weather changed Freddie came out and blasted a quickfire 62 to secure an eight-wicket victory for his side. Yet I smell the foul stench of media interference. Throughout the match the Sky commentators had been urging England coach Peter Moores to ring up Lancashire boss Mike Watkinson to tell him to let Freddie bat at 4. He'd batted at 8 in the first innings and had scored only six before gently prodding to mid-on. Yet second time around here he was striding out at 4, having decided that the only way to get out of his current batting rut was to blast just about everything that was thrown down at him. There were some hairy moments, but the England all-rounder survived to put on the winning partnership with the rather less heralded Paul Horton.
Manchester City signed a football player from Brazil today. Alas, it was not Ronaldinho, but Jo. Who? Dunno really, but apparently he is worth £18million. There had been a snag in the deal when it emerged that Jo was owned by a third party in a Carlos Tevez/Javier Mascherano kind of way. Seeing him today with his Manchester City scarf held up above his head I couldn't help thinking that he was a little bit scrawny. I actually typed thining instead of thinking there for a second. Just did it again. Freudian slip? Anyway third party ownership is A Bad Thing. If players must be transferred for fees that would instantly stop third world hunger, please can we have it done without the interference of sharp-suited buffoons with no interest in sport or anything resembling it?
What else today? Well, Roberto Di Matteo was appointed manager of the club formally known as Franchise FC and before that Wimbledon. MK Dons saw fit to replace Paul Ince with another former midfield general, but in this case he has no real experience to speak of. I wonder what he will make of lower league football. It's got to be better than sharing a dressing room with Gus Poyet, if you want to look at it more positively. Which I don't. I hate MK Dons and the whole idea that a team can just be uprooted from one location to another makes the contents of my stomach rush upwards. It's milk-curdlingly offensive. In the NBA the Seattle Supersonics are about to become the Oklahoma City Something Or Others. The city of Seattle has retained the rights to the name if not the team. All of which is rather like getting divorced, and being given custody of the television but not the channels within it. Yes I know that is impossible, but it is not that long ago that you would have said the same about moving a team from south London to Buckinghamshire. But they have.
Aston Villa have told Gareth Barry not to bother coming back either. The over-rated crab has demanded to be allowed to join Liverpool and gave a Sunday tabloid a piece of what passes for his mind on the subject. Question; Why do Liverpool want to pay £18million for Barry when they have a more sophisticated, better behaved version in Xabi Alonso? If I were Barry I would have kept my Gob shut. Pretty soon Villa's valuation is going to force Liverpool to pull out of the deal and then Barry will be stuck at Villa, either rotting in the reserves or trying to play for the first team despite the fact that his relationship with the fans, the manager and his team-mates has completely broken down. If they do part ways I hope Randy Lerner gives him the telly without the channels.
Tomorrow, ladies semi-final walkovers at Wimbledon, England test and ICC trophy squad selection, and all the usual whatever comes to mind bullshit. What do you care? You're not reading this anyway.
Stephen Orford
3 July 2008
This blog has spent much of its time (did you see how I discharged my responsibilities there?) having a pop at Andrew Flintoff. Well today the big daft lad with the mega-thick medical records went out and shoved my words down my throat.
The final day of Sussex v Lancashire at Hove looked like being a rain-ruined affair, but when the weather changed Freddie came out and blasted a quickfire 62 to secure an eight-wicket victory for his side. Yet I smell the foul stench of media interference. Throughout the match the Sky commentators had been urging England coach Peter Moores to ring up Lancashire boss Mike Watkinson to tell him to let Freddie bat at 4. He'd batted at 8 in the first innings and had scored only six before gently prodding to mid-on. Yet second time around here he was striding out at 4, having decided that the only way to get out of his current batting rut was to blast just about everything that was thrown down at him. There were some hairy moments, but the England all-rounder survived to put on the winning partnership with the rather less heralded Paul Horton.
Manchester City signed a football player from Brazil today. Alas, it was not Ronaldinho, but Jo. Who? Dunno really, but apparently he is worth £18million. There had been a snag in the deal when it emerged that Jo was owned by a third party in a Carlos Tevez/Javier Mascherano kind of way. Seeing him today with his Manchester City scarf held up above his head I couldn't help thinking that he was a little bit scrawny. I actually typed thining instead of thinking there for a second. Just did it again. Freudian slip? Anyway third party ownership is A Bad Thing. If players must be transferred for fees that would instantly stop third world hunger, please can we have it done without the interference of sharp-suited buffoons with no interest in sport or anything resembling it?
What else today? Well, Roberto Di Matteo was appointed manager of the club formally known as Franchise FC and before that Wimbledon. MK Dons saw fit to replace Paul Ince with another former midfield general, but in this case he has no real experience to speak of. I wonder what he will make of lower league football. It's got to be better than sharing a dressing room with Gus Poyet, if you want to look at it more positively. Which I don't. I hate MK Dons and the whole idea that a team can just be uprooted from one location to another makes the contents of my stomach rush upwards. It's milk-curdlingly offensive. In the NBA the Seattle Supersonics are about to become the Oklahoma City Something Or Others. The city of Seattle has retained the rights to the name if not the team. All of which is rather like getting divorced, and being given custody of the television but not the channels within it. Yes I know that is impossible, but it is not that long ago that you would have said the same about moving a team from south London to Buckinghamshire. But they have.
Aston Villa have told Gareth Barry not to bother coming back either. The over-rated crab has demanded to be allowed to join Liverpool and gave a Sunday tabloid a piece of what passes for his mind on the subject. Question; Why do Liverpool want to pay £18million for Barry when they have a more sophisticated, better behaved version in Xabi Alonso? If I were Barry I would have kept my Gob shut. Pretty soon Villa's valuation is going to force Liverpool to pull out of the deal and then Barry will be stuck at Villa, either rotting in the reserves or trying to play for the first team despite the fact that his relationship with the fans, the manager and his team-mates has completely broken down. If they do part ways I hope Randy Lerner gives him the telly without the channels.
Tomorrow, ladies semi-final walkovers at Wimbledon, England test and ICC trophy squad selection, and all the usual whatever comes to mind bullshit. What do you care? You're not reading this anyway.
Stephen Orford
3 July 2008
Wednesday 2 July 2008
Flintoff For England - My Arse; Wakey Wakey Wakey; Robbie Keane on Liverpool (Press Panic Now If You Support Spurs)
Day two of my new life as a pointless blogger, and still nobody is interested. You could look at that two ways. You could be really upset and give it all away. You know? Take your ball home and not come out playing again until the bigger boys promise to stop picking on you. Or you could see it as a golden opportunity to say absolutely anything, no matter how scandalous, and get away with it. So here goes;
Women's tennis is a waste of time.
While the quarter-finals of the women's singles at Wimbledon were under way I was blissfully unaware of what was going on. Instead I preferred to watch Lancashire plod their way to a winning position in their LV County Championship match against Sussex at Hove. The misadventures of Andrew 'Freddie' Flintoff continue. The England man couldn't buy a wicket, having Sussex skipper Chris Adams dropped at slip by Steven Croft. Undeterred, pantomime Dame Bob Willis insisted that Flintoff is ready to take his place in the England side for next week's first test against South Africa. Aye, and I'm ready to pilot flight AF966624 from Manchester to Mogadishu. Back to the game itself, and Sussex's main hope of avoiding defeat lies with the batting of Murray Goodwin. So, yesterday we had a good win for Murray, and today we have Murray Goodwin.
There was rugby this evening. Of the league variety of course. I'd rather be locked in a room with Fern Britton than watch rugby union. Instead it's Wakefield Trinity Wildcats against the grossly and distastefully manufactured Catalans Dragons at Belle Vue (or whatever ludicrous sponsors name their cess pit of a ground carries these days). After a tight first half the French/Australian side run out 30-14 winners to stay within three points of Super League leaders Leeds Rhinos and one of second placed Super Mighty St Helens. Biased? Me? You what?
Actually, I missed the second half of the rugby in any case. My girlfriend wanted to watch some God awful crime drama on Living or Channel Five or something. I decided I didn't mind. It's not like there was much quality on display in West Yorkshire anyway. If Catalans are the third best side in Super League then it is a sad state of affairs. What's happened to Wigan? Who gives a fuck?
The latest football transfer speculation has Robbie Keane joining Liverpool in exchange for Peter Crouch and some cash. I'll have a bit of that. Peter Crouch does a passable impression of a new born lamb on stilts, while I have always thought that Keane one of the Dullsville Premier League's more exciting assets. He could work well with El Nino. That is if he doesn't get himself sent off with his big fat mouth. Have you ever seen any player give referees so much abuse and get away with it? Even Wayne 'fucking ell you're joking, la' Rooney is jealous.
Over in Manchester Fergie says he will only sign one player this summer. Jesus Christ is expected to put pen to paper next week sometime. Asked about the future of Cristiano Ronaldo Fergie wouldn't be drawn. In fact he got quite uppity in that way he has. You know the one? The one which is supposed to scare journalists but is actually about as frightening as an Andrex puppy. All of which is a tell-tale sign that Sralex is not in control of the Ronaldo situation and doesn't much like the fact. I'm not a United fan but most of those I have spoken to that are want Ronaldo out of it and fast. He's fast becoming a distraction they don't need.
Tomorrow, news on Andy Murray's bid to reach the semi-finals at Wimbledon, the conclusion of Freddie Flintoff's nightmares, and maybe some more unfounded rumours from that summer institution the transfer rumour mill. It's bound to be bad news if you are a Spurs fans, but then that is your fault for supporting such an underachieving bunch of nearly men, isn't it?
Stephen Orford
July 2 2008
Women's tennis is a waste of time.
While the quarter-finals of the women's singles at Wimbledon were under way I was blissfully unaware of what was going on. Instead I preferred to watch Lancashire plod their way to a winning position in their LV County Championship match against Sussex at Hove. The misadventures of Andrew 'Freddie' Flintoff continue. The England man couldn't buy a wicket, having Sussex skipper Chris Adams dropped at slip by Steven Croft. Undeterred, pantomime Dame Bob Willis insisted that Flintoff is ready to take his place in the England side for next week's first test against South Africa. Aye, and I'm ready to pilot flight AF966624 from Manchester to Mogadishu. Back to the game itself, and Sussex's main hope of avoiding defeat lies with the batting of Murray Goodwin. So, yesterday we had a good win for Murray, and today we have Murray Goodwin.
There was rugby this evening. Of the league variety of course. I'd rather be locked in a room with Fern Britton than watch rugby union. Instead it's Wakefield Trinity Wildcats against the grossly and distastefully manufactured Catalans Dragons at Belle Vue (or whatever ludicrous sponsors name their cess pit of a ground carries these days). After a tight first half the French/Australian side run out 30-14 winners to stay within three points of Super League leaders Leeds Rhinos and one of second placed Super Mighty St Helens. Biased? Me? You what?
Actually, I missed the second half of the rugby in any case. My girlfriend wanted to watch some God awful crime drama on Living or Channel Five or something. I decided I didn't mind. It's not like there was much quality on display in West Yorkshire anyway. If Catalans are the third best side in Super League then it is a sad state of affairs. What's happened to Wigan? Who gives a fuck?
The latest football transfer speculation has Robbie Keane joining Liverpool in exchange for Peter Crouch and some cash. I'll have a bit of that. Peter Crouch does a passable impression of a new born lamb on stilts, while I have always thought that Keane one of the Dullsville Premier League's more exciting assets. He could work well with El Nino. That is if he doesn't get himself sent off with his big fat mouth. Have you ever seen any player give referees so much abuse and get away with it? Even Wayne 'fucking ell you're joking, la' Rooney is jealous.
Over in Manchester Fergie says he will only sign one player this summer. Jesus Christ is expected to put pen to paper next week sometime. Asked about the future of Cristiano Ronaldo Fergie wouldn't be drawn. In fact he got quite uppity in that way he has. You know the one? The one which is supposed to scare journalists but is actually about as frightening as an Andrex puppy. All of which is a tell-tale sign that Sralex is not in control of the Ronaldo situation and doesn't much like the fact. I'm not a United fan but most of those I have spoken to that are want Ronaldo out of it and fast. He's fast becoming a distraction they don't need.
Tomorrow, news on Andy Murray's bid to reach the semi-finals at Wimbledon, the conclusion of Freddie Flintoff's nightmares, and maybe some more unfounded rumours from that summer institution the transfer rumour mill. It's bound to be bad news if you are a Spurs fans, but then that is your fault for supporting such an underachieving bunch of nearly men, isn't it?
Stephen Orford
July 2 2008
Tuesday 1 July 2008
The Germans, Freddie Failure; Andy Murray Having His Tea
With Euro 2008 over we're having to make do with summer sports for the next six or seven weeks. While many of you will be experiencing withdrawal symptoms as a result, those who like their rugby league and cricket aswell as major tennis and golf tournaments might just find something of interest on these pages. If not, there is always the scurrullous transfer gossip to keep you occupied.
It's the last day of June. Spanish people are smashing up their beautiful land after their deserved Euro 2008 victory over Germany last night. Why is it that every other nation is referred to by football commentators by their full name except Germany? Watching the BBC's live coverage of the final I couldn't help but notice that John Motson and Mark Lawrenson persisted with calling Joachim Low's team 'The Germans' rather than Germany. It was as if they couldn't bring themselves to say the name. Have we really failed to get over our long-standing mistrust of all things German? Have the scars caused by Waddle, Pearce and Southgate's penalty blunders still to heal? Evidently. Not only did Motson insist on using the term 'The Germans', he delivered it with the kind of disdain normally reserved for Kate Silverton or Kirsty Young reporting on another convicted child killer.
It was Motty's last run out in international tournaments. Thank God for that. He's losing it, poor sod. Who can forget his bewildered response to Kanu's winning goal for Portsmouth in this year's FA Cup final? With the Nigerian performing his celebratory dance in the Cardiff City six-yard box, Motson fell completely silent, before informing us that the goal had been disallowed for offside. That Kanu was at leat three yards behind the last defender seemed not to matter to Motty. It just could not have been a goal in his mind, though the reasons why are unclear. Perhaps he just wasn't ready for it. What he is ready for is retirement. Sadly, we still have to put up with him for another couple of seasons on Match Of The Day.
Anyway, back to today and it is cricket and tennis dominating the sporting landscape. Sky Sports have really pushed the boat out in screening the whole of an LV County Championship match played over four days. Lancashire v Sussex is hardly compelling viewing, but the sight of Andrew Flintoff trudging off after another batting failure is a worrying one for England fans. Flintoff is fast becoming as over-rated an individual as Amy Winehouse. Apparently he is going to storm back to form, walk back into the England team and revive memories of England's stunning Ashes win of 2005. I just can't see it, personally. He's had a run of injuries to make Bryan Robson blush, and people forget that he is not getting any younger. I went to see him play for Lancs at Old Trafford in early May and would have been extremely disappointed had I paid for the privelege (those nice people at OT don't make you pay if you are a poor little disabled person). Flintoff was out for a first-ball duck that day, and fared little better at Sussex today. For the record, Lancs are doing ok because Stuart Law is a batting genius. Thirty-nine years old and still making mincemeat of the best bowling English county cricket has to offer, albeit on a pitch slow enough to hold snail races on. No wonder Team England are so nostalgic over Flintoff.
The main story in the tennis, and probably in the whole of British sport today is Andy Murray's five-set win over Richard Gasquet. The Frenchman served for the match at two sets and 5-4 up, but fluffed his lines to let Murray back in. From then on Murray played like Bjorn Borg on amphetimines, whipping the Pimm's drinkers on Henman Hill into a frenzy with a sensational comeback. Sealing the third set with a shot from another postcode, Murray blasted his way through the fourth before edging out a bewildered Gasquet in a fifth set played in almost complete darkness. He was seen eating his tea at the post-game press conference. Is this boy that rude, or is he just supremely cool? If he beats Rafa Nadal in the quarter-finals on Wednesday, his rudeness, coolness or otherwise will be irrelevant. He'll be elevated to national hero status overnight. Hell, he's even got me interested in tennis!
I promised you some football gossip and news so here we go. Deco has signed for Chelsea for two years for £8million. Is it just me or have Chelsea wasted their dough on this one? He's past 30, spends more time on the deck than an extra from a Johnny Depp pirate movie and in my humble opinion is hardly suited to the fast-paced Premier League style. Games might just pass him by, that is if he actually gets into a midfield which already contains Michael Ballack, Frank Lampard, Jon Obi Mikel, Michael Essien and Claude Makelele. The fact that his former boss at Portugal Luiz Felipe Scolari is now in charge at Chelsea might help him get some game time, but if I were a Chelsea fan I would be concerned that his arrival may spark the departure of Fat Frank. Lampard is not one of my favourites, to put it mildly, but you can't argue with his record while playing for Chelsea. He and Steven Gerrard have taken goalscoring from midfield to new levels in recent years, and if he rejoins Jose Mourinho at Inter Milan I think Chelsea will miss Lampard more than they realise. Certainly more than I will, at any rate.
Hands up who thought Mauricio Pellegrino (who?) resembled a fish up a tree during his short spell at Liverpool a couple of years back? My arm is almost out of its socket stretching for the sky at this point. Worrying then that Pellegrino has been brought in as a coach by Rafa Benitez, and more worrying still that Rafa has said that his new man will work closely with the defence in particular. I'm not really looking forward to that. As a Liverpool fan, I am not relishing the prospect of watching Jamie Carragher perfect the art of standing around idly with his arm in the air while the latest Premier League sprinter whistles by to shoot past Pepe Reina in goal. And doesn't all of this take some of the shine off Rafa's well received decision to appoint Sammy Lee to the coaching staff? Just when you think that Rafa is reviving the old boot room culture, he farts in your face by appointing a man who was apparently the first Argentine to play for Liverpool. He has started a trend of naff players from that part of the world arriving at Anfield too. Javier Mascherano is still enjoying Flintoff-like hype despite spending most of his time either giving the ball away or arguing pointlessly with officials on matters which don't concern him.
Tomorrow more on Freddie Flintoff, aswell as full details should anything interesting happen in the ladies quarter-finals at Wimbledon.
Stephen Orford
July 1 2008
It's the last day of June. Spanish people are smashing up their beautiful land after their deserved Euro 2008 victory over Germany last night. Why is it that every other nation is referred to by football commentators by their full name except Germany? Watching the BBC's live coverage of the final I couldn't help but notice that John Motson and Mark Lawrenson persisted with calling Joachim Low's team 'The Germans' rather than Germany. It was as if they couldn't bring themselves to say the name. Have we really failed to get over our long-standing mistrust of all things German? Have the scars caused by Waddle, Pearce and Southgate's penalty blunders still to heal? Evidently. Not only did Motson insist on using the term 'The Germans', he delivered it with the kind of disdain normally reserved for Kate Silverton or Kirsty Young reporting on another convicted child killer.
It was Motty's last run out in international tournaments. Thank God for that. He's losing it, poor sod. Who can forget his bewildered response to Kanu's winning goal for Portsmouth in this year's FA Cup final? With the Nigerian performing his celebratory dance in the Cardiff City six-yard box, Motson fell completely silent, before informing us that the goal had been disallowed for offside. That Kanu was at leat three yards behind the last defender seemed not to matter to Motty. It just could not have been a goal in his mind, though the reasons why are unclear. Perhaps he just wasn't ready for it. What he is ready for is retirement. Sadly, we still have to put up with him for another couple of seasons on Match Of The Day.
Anyway, back to today and it is cricket and tennis dominating the sporting landscape. Sky Sports have really pushed the boat out in screening the whole of an LV County Championship match played over four days. Lancashire v Sussex is hardly compelling viewing, but the sight of Andrew Flintoff trudging off after another batting failure is a worrying one for England fans. Flintoff is fast becoming as over-rated an individual as Amy Winehouse. Apparently he is going to storm back to form, walk back into the England team and revive memories of England's stunning Ashes win of 2005. I just can't see it, personally. He's had a run of injuries to make Bryan Robson blush, and people forget that he is not getting any younger. I went to see him play for Lancs at Old Trafford in early May and would have been extremely disappointed had I paid for the privelege (those nice people at OT don't make you pay if you are a poor little disabled person). Flintoff was out for a first-ball duck that day, and fared little better at Sussex today. For the record, Lancs are doing ok because Stuart Law is a batting genius. Thirty-nine years old and still making mincemeat of the best bowling English county cricket has to offer, albeit on a pitch slow enough to hold snail races on. No wonder Team England are so nostalgic over Flintoff.
The main story in the tennis, and probably in the whole of British sport today is Andy Murray's five-set win over Richard Gasquet. The Frenchman served for the match at two sets and 5-4 up, but fluffed his lines to let Murray back in. From then on Murray played like Bjorn Borg on amphetimines, whipping the Pimm's drinkers on Henman Hill into a frenzy with a sensational comeback. Sealing the third set with a shot from another postcode, Murray blasted his way through the fourth before edging out a bewildered Gasquet in a fifth set played in almost complete darkness. He was seen eating his tea at the post-game press conference. Is this boy that rude, or is he just supremely cool? If he beats Rafa Nadal in the quarter-finals on Wednesday, his rudeness, coolness or otherwise will be irrelevant. He'll be elevated to national hero status overnight. Hell, he's even got me interested in tennis!
I promised you some football gossip and news so here we go. Deco has signed for Chelsea for two years for £8million. Is it just me or have Chelsea wasted their dough on this one? He's past 30, spends more time on the deck than an extra from a Johnny Depp pirate movie and in my humble opinion is hardly suited to the fast-paced Premier League style. Games might just pass him by, that is if he actually gets into a midfield which already contains Michael Ballack, Frank Lampard, Jon Obi Mikel, Michael Essien and Claude Makelele. The fact that his former boss at Portugal Luiz Felipe Scolari is now in charge at Chelsea might help him get some game time, but if I were a Chelsea fan I would be concerned that his arrival may spark the departure of Fat Frank. Lampard is not one of my favourites, to put it mildly, but you can't argue with his record while playing for Chelsea. He and Steven Gerrard have taken goalscoring from midfield to new levels in recent years, and if he rejoins Jose Mourinho at Inter Milan I think Chelsea will miss Lampard more than they realise. Certainly more than I will, at any rate.
Hands up who thought Mauricio Pellegrino (who?) resembled a fish up a tree during his short spell at Liverpool a couple of years back? My arm is almost out of its socket stretching for the sky at this point. Worrying then that Pellegrino has been brought in as a coach by Rafa Benitez, and more worrying still that Rafa has said that his new man will work closely with the defence in particular. I'm not really looking forward to that. As a Liverpool fan, I am not relishing the prospect of watching Jamie Carragher perfect the art of standing around idly with his arm in the air while the latest Premier League sprinter whistles by to shoot past Pepe Reina in goal. And doesn't all of this take some of the shine off Rafa's well received decision to appoint Sammy Lee to the coaching staff? Just when you think that Rafa is reviving the old boot room culture, he farts in your face by appointing a man who was apparently the first Argentine to play for Liverpool. He has started a trend of naff players from that part of the world arriving at Anfield too. Javier Mascherano is still enjoying Flintoff-like hype despite spending most of his time either giving the ball away or arguing pointlessly with officials on matters which don't concern him.
Tomorrow more on Freddie Flintoff, aswell as full details should anything interesting happen in the ladies quarter-finals at Wimbledon.
Stephen Orford
July 1 2008
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